Given the comments I received on my last blog post, particularly from DarkHorseSub which were very helpful, I will make sure that anything I submit as a comment but which I wish to share with the world, I will also make a blog post. Below is the first.
I was asked to point a sub’s wife to some useful Femdom advice literature on a specific topic. I responded.
I am afraid I know of no written works which appropriately and accurately set out the needs of the deeply sexually submissive. Were I to have a conversation with your wife, I would say this.
‘If you love your submissive and you wish to be kind to your submissive and have him/her sleep the most sound and contented sleep they can every know, then the saying -‘you have to be cruel to be kind’, is the mantra by which you must live. The deeply submissive is a paradox. They need to feel helplessly in the control of another. That entails feeling that they are treated unfairly when it comes to things like allocations of chores and leisure time. It means they have to be genuinely very fearful and frightened of the punishments that are given in response to infractions. It also means they have to be subjected to pain and humiliation that they do not enjoy. It is only when they are genuinely fearful of punishment for infractions and when they suffer pain and humiliation and unfairness they genuinely would rather not experience, that they feely truly controlled and in the helpless power of another. And without feeling truly controlled and in the helpless power of another, they can NEVER be wholly content with their lives. So real love and kindness for a true submissive does not mean going easy on them in any way, or being fair with them – that causes discontent and unhappiness and is not being kind.
A subsequent comment was received.
Dear Mistress Scarlett. That response is truly awesome. Thank You so much. This one was never a deep sleeper until Mistress had me sleeping in shackles, at my instigation. So Mistress understands this aspect. This boy spends the day doing house work in collars when possible and is used by his owner for personal care. Punishment and discipline are rare however because, as previously stated, Mistress worries about hurting me. So yes, your response has hit (lol) the nail on the head so to speak. This boy is therefore not fearful. But desires to be. Most of the submission is self derived so at times this boy becomes extremely agitated. Your control and understanding of You pet is remarkable and i am so pleased for You that You have this. Again, thank You so much for Your response. Bowing deeply before You.
A final comment was received.
Dear Mistress Scarlet. This boy would like to relate to You what has happened subsequent to his discussing with my Mistress Wife Your text as shown above. Mistress stated that She was not interested in humiliation and then I guess reflected for a few days on O/our discussion. Yesterday Mistress turned to this boy and stated…. I own You, you are to respond to my instructions immediately as you are My personal property. Mistress then instructed boy to disrobe and bend over the bench. Mistress then proceeded to beat this boys backside. Mistress was hard and unrelenting. All subsequent commands have been absolute and have required instant responses. Various parts of boys body are currently either sore or tender.
Thank You so much for Your advice and guidance. This boy now understands that its life is now totally within the wants and needs of its Owner and it looks forward to servitude.