Monthly Archives: September 2017

Pretty Nettle Pouch?

Pink Gimp kindly sent me the following comment.

Hi came across this item,¬†¬† and thought of the nettle pouch You use on bitchboy, more fitting look lol ūüėā and nice pink colour.

He is so right but before I purchase, I have one concern which perhaps a blog follower may be able to answer. Has anyone bought this item and if yes, can the drawstring be tied really tightly or does the elasticated opening prevent the draw string being tied really tightly?

How hard to smack the object?

The wonderful Christine M left me a comment with this  question.

Ms Scarlet
I have always avoided spanking the penis out of fear of serious bruising, knowing there are so many blood vessels within. Can I therefore enquire, when you use the ruler, can you give an indication of how hard you strike, and what might be a typical number of strokes? This is not mentioned in your Manual, which I have enjoyed.
At the end, is there much bruising, and if so, how long does it last?

This is my response below. Do any other ruler smacking users have any guidance tips on how hard to smack?

It is hard to put into the written word how hard a smack should be. I can tell you that there is never any bruising afterwards as a result. I smack at least until the penis has been turned a shade of pink compared to its normal colour. As far as I can tell, if smacking with the force required for that, there is no limit to the number of smacks that can be applied. Quite a good smacking method, is two light taps followed by a serious ‚Äėtap‚Äô. Then repeat that sequence of three ‚Äď again, and again and again. A good way to judge the right force for the smacks is to experiment by smacking your own inner thigh or inner wrist. (Not in front of your sub). I have had many guests apply smacking and I do so at least twice a week, and there has never been any damage. I find a good smacking force causes whimpering and pleading, especially when applied to an already smacked-sore, pink penis, but does not cause shouting out or screaming. Please let me know how your first session goes and what if any of what I have written is helpful. I will then include any that is in edition 2 of my Manual at some point.

LINK to my published journals.

LINK to my published BDSM manual.

Alternative punishment

Well it was a full-on domination day but it was also the day before bitch-boy had to go to hospital for a very personal examination. (Nothing serious.) I had decided to accompany him to the hospital. I had insisted he shave his genitals today so that would be an embarrassment for him at the hospital. I decided he could snap out his black, acrylic frenum piercing ring. I would have him glue another ring in place when we got back from the hospital.

However today, he was due a serious punishment for an infraction. I decided against the cane or similar as I did not want his butt all bruised and marked. I did not want to be reported for assault or domestic abuse. But he did need a punishment. I could not count nettles or Linnex to his clitty as punishment as he would be getting one or both anyway, just for my amusement. I could not count two hours in TSD as punishment as he would be getting that anyway, just for my amusement. The same for a substantial cock spanking with the ruler.

This quandary did bring home to me the tricky issue, (I have tried to deal with in my published manual), of differentiating between punishment for infractions and torment for fun. The submissive must know when each is happening and be very clear on that. They must also know that punishment can be avoided, (although torment cannot), if they do not commit any infractions. They must very much want to avoid punishment.

Because of my theory, detailed in my post of yesterday, I do not invent infractions to find an excuse to torment.

In the end, because I like thrashing his butt so much, I opted to postpone his punishment for three days until my next full-on domination day. I have adopted the habit of a very generous deterrent punishment at the beginning of a full-on domination day (as I mentioned in my  post of August 28), and then around an hour later dishing out any actual punishment due. I am a serious sadist because I love to use my cane, paddle and quirt to punish those already red, sore and puffy butt cheeks. Oh poor bitch-boy is so full of woe and disbelief as I nonchalantly spend my time giving one stroke after another after another. His helplessness and pleading give me SUCH A POWER RUSH and associated arousal. And my clear and obvious sadism and pitilessness has him in awe of me when it is all over. Perfect symbiosis!

POSTCRIPT – There were two specialists working in the relevant hospital consultation area. A middle aged aunty type and a very attractive young woman. I knew either would be an embarrassment for him for different reasons, but JACKPOT! he drew the short straw and was led off by the very attractive much younger specialist for his personal examination.

Maximising the effect on the submissive.

On the 2nd September I posted a theory on maximising the effect on the submissive. There was more detail, but the key I contend is that the submissive’s PERCEPTION of the dominant’s cruelty is key to maximising effect. I mentioned that if there is any doubt that humiliating, painful,  tedious, and or demeaning activity for the submissive was giving sadistic pleasure to the dominant, then the dominant should verbalise that fact.

(I amended the theory the next day to say that if the Domme makes it ABSOLUTELY clear to the submissive that the Domme is a sadist and many acts in which they partake are to satisfy their sadistic desires, then there is no need to verbalise their sadism. I will stress however that there must be no doubt in the mind of the submissive. Any such doubt should be eradicated by verbalising. If in doubt, verbalise.)

Well I have, since these posts, had around a dozen responses to my theory from submissives and 100% agree with the theory. So ladies, if you really want your puppet addicted to you, DON’T BE SHY! You must make it very apparent that you get pleasure from inflicting physical and or mental suffering. If you have feared using the word as a label for yourself. Start using it. – ¬†I am a sadist.

LINK to my published journals.

LINK to my published BDSM manual.

Slaves’ Born Again Virgin Status (BAVS)

I wrote about this before, a couple of years ago. But recent interactions have caused me to wonder about the prevalence of returning male submissive puppets back to virgin status; never ever again allowed to penetrate their Mistress, or any woman.

It is around 11 years now for bitch-boy. For the puppet of my newest wonderful Domme friend, Mistress Nicola, it is 4 years, and for a delightful domestic USA Domme, Mistress Rebecca, I have been recently corresponding with by email, it is about 4 months. (My email correspondence with her, during the period she pondered and then made her decision to return her repeatedly tearful husband to BAVS, and some commentary from me, features as a short entry in the draft of Volume 12 of my journals.)

With bitch-boy and I it just kinda happened. I realised we had drifted into it and I loved it. I told bitch-boy he was a born again virgin and he was crushed, and so I loved it even more. Of all the things he hates but must endure, this is the thing he would change if given the option to change one thing. Which he never will be! With Mistresses Nicola and Rebecca it was a conscious decision.

So my question is simple. How many male submissives in long term relationships have been made born again virgins by their Mistress? Please let me know either way.


LINK to my 11 published journals.

LINK to my published BDSM manual.






The science of stinging nettles

I thought I had banged on about nettles until everyone was bored rigid. However I received this question in a comment.

P.S. Are you able / willing to share a photo of the type of nettles to look out for please?

So I hope this will be a definitive post.

The best nettles are bright, bottle green in colour and have yet to flower.  The leaves are close together at the top, which is a fantastic side effect of them being at the right stage; when it comes to whipping or stroking with them. This is the Springtime nettle. These  sting the most by far and the stings can last for 4 hours.

As we move to summer the nettles flower, (the strings of bobbles). The colour becomes more grey and the leaves are spread out along the stem. These sting the least and the stings last the shortest amount of time. The spread out leaves are unhelpful too.

If flowering stems are cut down, new green shoots grow from the remaining stem stub, and later in summer new shoots come from the ground. These two types tend to have weak slender stems, but are almost as good as the spring, pre-flowering stage. Always opt for weak, floppy stemmed new shoots over sturdy, grey, already flowered old shoots!

Remove some leaves from the stem for a handle to grip. Whipping with nettles works best, followed by constant stroking at the same location, before moving on. Reagrding the penis, the head is more painful that the shaft and the closer to the urethra opening the more intense the pain Рthis can be incredibly intense very close to the opening, compared to the shaft stings.

I find the most psychologically impactful is just to sting the penis (and perhaps the scrotum), but not the inner thighs or butt or stomach. This concentrates the pain on the most sensitive area, rather than spreading it out. This is why I use the nettle apron. PIC. and old POST.  Working with one single stem of a few leaves can be more effective than a big bunch of stems and leaves.

There is a little more information, particularly on using a sunglasses pouch, and some video links in this post.

LINK to my 11 published journals.

LINK to my published BDSM manual.