I received from Ms C and JJ the comment below and for me it includes one of the most powerful, cruel, clever chastity schemes I have ever encountered! Needless to say I have worked up a version for poor bitch-boy.
……. One of the couples we keep in contact with via e.mail from the munch have a different chastity regime however. They are heading towards an orgasm free (for him) relationship but the twist being the date of his final orgasm is entirely in his hands, so to speak.
They have been in a full FLR relationship for over 10 years and when he turned 50 a couple of years ago, her gift to him was a full neosteel belt to replace the mature metal cage they had used for years. In addition to this she gave him 50 numbered plastic discs.
Her idea being that if he gets to a stage where he can no longer deal with the frustration of being locked away, then he brings her a numbered disc – working down from 50 – and she will unlock and supervise him as he masturbates to release in front of her. He can do this whenever he feels the need to, as she puts it ‘relieve his silly male desires’. The sting in the tale is that once he has used all the discs then that will be it….. Something she is really clear on – NO further orgasms for him; however much he begs.
When we last met up back in Feb this year he was already down to disc 37 and had used 12 of the discs in a little over 2 years. His Mistress was quick to point out that at this rate by the time he is 58 his limited sex life will be over for good. My Wife got an email the other day from them and he is now down to disc 35. Even if he manages to reduce his releases down to just two a year from now on, (doubtful), he will only be 70 by the time enforced celibacy is imposed on him.
I admit that I find the idea of this method very exciting, but at the same time terrifying and certainly not something I’d want my Mistress to take up. Thankfully I believe she is more than happy being in full control of my relief.
Once again thank you for your blog from both my Mistress & I
Ms C & JJ
Mistress Scarlet's Blog 
To be told your sex life is over would be so soul destroying….knowing that the will and desire of your loved one can be so cruel and heartless…gut wrenching…
Might even asked to be gelded to help with life long frustration…….
shudders, in awe, excitement & fear!
May we know your version for BB please Ms Scarlet?
I cannot yet reveal that as it is yet to be revealed to bitch-boy. But he knows the concept will be adopted by me. There was so, so much begging and pleading at the announcement but all to no avail as my mind is made up and I NEVER change my mind on such matters. I think I can confirm my version provides more fun for me than the original version provides for that Mistress, without taking away any of the misery for my bitch.
Absolutely gorgeous
Wonderful! I am beginning to think I am perhaps being too lenient! It has inspired me to think of some new twists to David’s ssheet regime.
Its so wonderful on so many levels!
Apologies I am not sure how to reply successfully
I tried one method but it didn’t seem to work, forgive me if this is a duplicate.
My wife has found a crueller regime for orgasm that we’d like to share. Because I now have small ejaculations in my chastity cage from time to time as a result of physical or verbal abuse, I have been told these are the only releases I will be having.
I can say that they bring no satisfaction and apart from a feeling of being very sexually aroused there is no spurt but more a firm steady leak for about two seconds. As I am forced to consume my emission I can say it is definitely not precum but the full taste of spunk. Not my favourite by a long way.
She wanted to feedback as she has read and read your manual and appreciates your advice.
Your wife sounds wonderfully dominant!
“Needless to say I have worked up a version for poor bitch-boy.”
How so?
I cannot yet reveal that as it is yet to be revealed to bitch-boy. But he knows the concept will be adopted by me. There was so, so much begging and pleading at the announcement but all to no avail as my mind is made up and I NEVER change my mind on such matters. I think I can confirm my version provides more fun for me than the original version provides for that Mistress, without taking away any of the misery for my bitch.
I wonder whether you would ever use the last one….always wanting to leave yourself hope that it’s not all over…..but it in a way foolish, as no doubt you will ultimately deny yourself that last one as the grime reaper claims you before you can use it…..
Dear Mistress Scarlet, curtsy
Many people live full lives without orgasms for many different reason.I don’t read many any more but I have read on other blogs of wives who only grant one orgasm a year and I have seen videos of the that orgasm timed and ruined. This particular person will be in his eighty or nineties if he picks one each year. Not to many ninety year old people are concerned with masturbation. In this case everything is boiled down to the microcosm of personal kink. I wish for everyone reading long healthy lives.
With respect, a curtsy, and growing wonderment, fifi
Who are these many people who live full lives without orgasms?
Dear Mistress Scarlet, curtsy
I am going to sound argumentative which is a true dilemma for a subordinate in the D/S, or FLR lifestyle but, a full life is subjective, certainly.
Many medical reasons and injury can forbid orgasm. Exhaustion from just running the daily life of a family might postpone self pleasure for months. Not everyone is sexual charged as others. The body has a way of getting what ever it needs. If it needs an orgasm it will have one, or many little internal ones.
History, or, legend, has said Issac Newton died a virgin. Maybe he masturbated or maybe he had other things on his mind.
A chastity devise prevents penetration not orgasms. To be truthful a submissive person in chastity is ultimately in control because they are surrendering their orgasm.
Thank you for allowing my opinion.
With respect and a curtsy, Fifi
As I suspected you have no evidence at all that ‘…….many people live full lives without orgasms……’ Just supposition based on nothing but your own imagination and fantasies. And absolute idiocy to follow that supposition by stating that ‘…. a submissive person in chastity is ultimately in control because they are surrendering their orgasm…..’ Obviously if they are not allowed orgasms, they are not surrendering them, they are denied them and it is absolutely out of their control. I cannot think what motivated you to write such stuff.
Catholic priests,monks and many people who are ;living in the later years of their lives.
Are you living in the 17th century???? I nearly spat my tea over my keyboard! Catholic priests live fulfilled lives without orgasms do they? I can list the tens of thousands of pieces of evidence that refute that and, if I tried, no doubt the names of many of the tens of thousands of people who, when children, were raped by catholic priests. Do you have any empathy at all for any of those, that might read your comment?
And monks. Why don’t you Google ‘Buddhist monk rape’ and ‘christian monk rape’ and look at the lists of cases that will be presented to you.
I have no idea What motivated you to write your comment.
Dear Mistress Scarlet, thank You so much again for finding the most amazind Dommes. i would love to hear more from Ms C and JJ about T/their life and friends. The delicious irony of the expression “an orgasm free…relationship” is wonderful, it sounds so positive! humbly, chrissie
There are a lot of possibilities with this method.
One that I thought of is to decide the final age of having the last orgasm. For example, let’s say that the age of the sub is 45 and his mistress decides that he will have the last orgasm at the age of 67 or he himself can choose the final age but it will mean less/more frequency of orgasms for more/less final age respectively.
Now, he has 22 years left which means around 8000 days. Now she will choose a frequency. Let’s say she chooses 100 (1 orgasm every 80 days on average). Now they will create 100 random numbers whose sum is 8000.
After every orgasm, he will choose a number and he will get the next orgasm after that number of days. Let’s say the first number he chooses is 10, then he will get an Orgasm after 10 days. After this he chooses 300, then he will get the next orgasm after 300 days and so on.
Also, it can be decided whether he will choose the next number before an orgasm or after since it will affect his decision-making capabilities.
The numbers can be chosen in creative ways.
For example, they can be 80, 80, … (100 times) which is boring.
The 100 numbers can be 10, …, 100, …, 300, …, 1000, so that the total sum is almost 8000.
Or 1, 1, … (48 times), 100, 100, … (49 times), 1000, 1000, 1100. All these 1s will waste his 48 chances as they will not give as much pleasure because of being 1 day after the previous orgasm and in turn, they will increase the size of other numbers to compensate for the sum. He will have to decide when to choose the numbers 1000, 1000, and 1100 (3 years).
There are endless possibilities and they can be randomly generated using a code that ensures that their sum is 8000.
He also chose to decide the age when he will have his final orgasm. The cruelty mainly depends on the total number of chances being allowed.
I find this post a little terrifying but exciting.
I don’t think I’ll ever use this method. For me j. will never have the slightest control over his sexuality, it is I who choose where when and how.
I am not a fan either of him announced that he will never have an orgasm again, I think that leaving him a hope is more effective, Although I can choose to deprive him of any orgasm without his knowing it that the last will be the last and that he always keeps a little hope.
I totally agree with your view dear Brigite.
It’s more motivating for the slave to keep the slightest hope for a release.
Even if we decide that an orgasm will be his last orgasm, he should not know about this fact. Hope dies last! LOL.
It is so interesting how often we poor Mistresses have to make choices that involve us losing some pleasures to gain others. Life just is not fair! LOL. I am missing out currently having bitch-boy never out of his chastity cage. Missing out on applying serious dickie-discipline and on applying physical tease and denial (edging) activities. But I am gaining on just how much bitch-boy HATES always being in a cage, never getting hard, etc.
I can understand the view of Brigite and yourself if saying no more orgasms ever, you miss out on dashing the slave’s hope. Because he has no hope.
BUT, you do gain the one or two years of his his absolute despair and desolation through his impending end of his sex life and his sense of his impending emasculation.
The difficult decisions we Mistresses have to make! Poor us.
That is also a very correct view dear Scarlet.
The way you put it, the desperation he will feel knowing that his “sex life” comes to the end, must be also priceless :)
You are right, poor us! We have to make such difficult decisions all the time!
In my experience of the worm slave’s reaction, I believe it is harder for him to live with the chastity always on and without even the slightest moment to be aroused for extended periods of time (months) rather than edging activities and teasing.
So keep up the good job you do with bb :)
The real good thing behind this chastity regime is the clever action from the Mistress to let the slave to make his own decision about the frequency of his orgasms LOL.
We are all aware how stupid males behave on these occassions, we know very well that male’s urges are too crazy and they behave like children who have been forbidden to chocolate and sweets.
Obviously he will end all his 50 orgasms in about next 3 years or so in my opinion. No doubt! Males are thinking with their small head instead of their brains.
In fact it is an action of leniency and magnanimity when a Mistress entirely controls a slave’s orgasms. Because the Mistress has the mind and the brain to wisely allow the slave an orgasm when he really needs it, no sooner and no later.
Dear slaves, you must be trained by this example of chastity regime, don’t take in your hands your own pleasure, you are not able to make the right decisions! LOL
Come to think of it, this method has a few advantages, especially when it only has one or two disks left and feels the end is near. The Mistress can take the opportunity to remind her constantly, it’s approaching, it’s approaching, only two and goodbye. I imagine when he only has one left, I think his despair will be at its height.
How to take advantage of this ultimate orgasm, how to delay the inevitable, how will he do then while remaining chaste until his last day.
On the other hand, after, nothing then prevents the Mistress from changing her mind and giving her back a little hope.
But it remains that my thoughts
As a male who has owned a variety of different chastity devices, CB 3000, Steelworxx, and full Neosteel over the years, I found after a prolonged period in chastity, such as 30 days, I was able to cum in the device, without unlocking it. Had I been in a committed Fem Dom relationship then that might have provided the focus and incentive not to cum, to please my Mistress and honour my agreement to be submissive to her. As it was, the choice was mine. I wonder how many submissive men reading this actually give up their orgasms voluntarily and could cum if they wanted, even though they may be in a relationship to maintain the dynamic.
Could you specify what you mean by ‘cum’. There is a big difference between an emission, like a wet dream, and an orgasm that includes tens of seconds or a minute or two of euphoria.
By cum I mean achieve an orgasm in the device by manual stimulation. Moving the device up and down, whilst locked, causing friction that excited me, to the moment of release when I ejaculated. At which point I had mixed feelings of euphoria at a semen emission and disappointment that I had defeated the device. The most difficult was the Neosteel as once locked the tightness of the fitting makes it impossible to remove without the key, however to my surprise, I could also orgasm in that, after sufficient days had elapsed to build my desire. Thank you.
I really need to press you as you have not answered my question which it seems, I am struggling to put succinctly.
What you have called ‘euphoria’, that resulted ‘because of a semen emission’ does not sound like actual euphoria, according to the definition of euphoria associated with an orgasm. That being, tens of seconds, perhaps over a minute, of zero awareness of where you are due to an overwhelming flood of endorphins in the brain; a state of delirium, being unable to think or speak clearly. Rather than the small release of endorphins associated with achieving a success. In your case, the success of generating an emission while caged.
Thank you Miss Scarlet for giving me the opportunity to examine my experience more closely. I realise that I compartmentalised achieving an orgasm, whilst caged, as success, without evaluating the mental and physical sensations fully. In truth, it has been some years since I had an orgasm whilst caged so to provide a qualitative judgement on the experience and compare it with the state which you articulately describe would require me re-experiencing it. I do suspect that an emission, whilst caged, will pale in comparison to a full or ruined orgasm, uncaged. However, in the interests of research, with Loctober approaching I am thinking of trying this and will report back my findings. Thank you.
Dear Mistress Scarlet, curtsy
………………………………..
With respect and a curtsy, fifi
I have made a decision. There are two or three alleged submissive males who quite often leave comments on my blog and when I see they have left a comment for me to deal with, my heart sinks. I feel dismayed. I feel tired. You are one of those males. The comments are often actually disrespectful, even when topped and tailed with bogus deference, show zero empathy to me or anyone else and are usually not real life accounts of interest, but rather a flow of consciousness of unfounded, inconsistent opinions. My responses are met with arguement for its own sake or the sake of ego. My decision is that I will no longer answer or even publish such comments. They will simply be deleted. This is not Facebook or Twitter and I do not have to have added to my considerable work involved in maintaining this blog, unnecessary feelings of dismay and effort.
I am sorry to have to respond to you in this way but I hope you agree I do not have to have added to my considerable work unnecessary feelings of dismay and effort. You are of course free to continue submit comments but if they do not appear I have simply deleted them.
Thank you so much for your final comment; it has been very helpful. I was very unsure about taking the action I had, but your helpful comment has confirmed that I did exactly the right thing. You read that my heart sank whenever I got a comment from you, and do you take a moment to reflect on yourself? Obviously not. Which surprises me, given you told me your last Mistress kicked you out for the manner in which you gave your opinions and how you dealt with her responses; and now another Mistress does the same thing. But you are innocent of all poor behaviour. What a horrible coincidence you met two close-minded, ill informed Mistress’s you knew better than all the time.
As anyone knows from reading my blog, I have taken on board so many contrary views while managing this blog and will continue to do so whenever someone points out a superior view on a subject to my own.
Obviously I abhor Marxism.
So I need not even read any other comment you make as I am now, in my tiny world, secure in my decision.
So amusing. “Whip me whip me” cried the masochist. “No” said the sadist.
There are so many so-called submissives who simply do not understand it is the dominant partner who makes the rules.
As I have said to David, “If I require your opinion, I will tell you what it is!”
very good! hahaha
This is so true, that males think through their loins far too often.
In my household we address this by considering his actions and from whence they arise.
Displays of male arrogance or ego are considered to evolve from the loins.
We deal with such issues by punishing the appropriate offender, namely his wayward appendage.
Yes, he dreads those occasions when i determine the root cause of his misbehaviour resides between his legs, for that is when Nurse Linnex assists with the cure!
Wonderful
I agree with Brigitte that the method mentioned in the post has the defect (from my point of view) of leaving the slave the right to decide when to cum. On the other hand Ms Anne is not wrong in stating that, given the very poor ability of slaves to contain their impulses, the slave would probably run out of 50 tokens in no time, then facing a life of abstinence and frustration.
The fact of setting a final limit after which the slave can no longer have orgasms and is aware of it intrigues me.
Sure, the Mistress would lose the pleasure of destroying the slave’s hope … but I believe that the cruelty of imposing infinite abstinence and chastity, and reminding the slave day by day that this happens only for the Mistress’s sadism can compensate the first loss.
I would like to think of a method by which there is a maximum number of orgasms (or possibilities of orgasm) left to the slave after which chastity becomes definitive. In this regard, I am thinking of a modification to my card game that might work.
If you like, I will describe it to you in a next post when I have perfected it … even if I don’t know yet whether to actually put it into practice.
A greeting
Francesca
Yes, please let me know all about it.
My system of him running down to total abstinence, still includes me saying no when he asks sometimes.
Dear Scarlet
This idea came to me recalling a story I read some time ago on internet, where a very similar chastity regime was applied to a sissy by extracting keys for her chastity cage from a vase, in which the (few) keys that opened the cage were mixed with the (many) keys that did not open it.
Since the chastity regime of sissy slave m. is based on a card game, I thought of something very similar but based on cards.
The basic principle is always that of the card game in force today and, therefore, orgasm with cards of hearts (ruined from 2 to 10 and full from J to A) while with clubs, spades and diamonds no orgasm.
The changes from his actual regime would be as follows:
The slave can try his luck at a specific time interval, for example every month, rather than at the intervals provided for by the old rules.
Immediately after being chosen, the card of the month is destroyed.
Once the cards of hearts are finished the slave can no longer have orgasms for the rest of his life.
Before any choice the slave is subject to the evaluation of the Mistress for his behavior in the previous period.
The evaluation, of course, is absolutely indisputable and unappealable.
If the evaluation is favorable, the card is turned over, otherwise it is destroyed without even being seen and the slave will not know until the end if the destroyed card was of hearts and, therefore, if one of his few last orgasms was destroyed with it.
After the card has been turned over, the slave suffers the punishment for that specific card as per the old rules.
If the card is destroyed without being turned over, the slave’s punishment is that foreseen for the worst of the cards.
This method, in my opinion, contains the best elements of the regime hypothesized by the post that we comment but without its disadvantages.
In fact the slave knows that he has a very limited number of orgasms left (some of them ruined), after which he will be only chastity and frustration for the rest of his life and, therefore, he lives the game in desperate awareness of this.
In this the regime is similar to that of the post.
In the regime I imagine, however, the slave cannot choose when to have his orgasms and cannot decide how long to make them last.
I mean that, for example, in the regime described by the post, a wise slave (I agree with Ms Anne who probably aren’t there, but you can never tell) could go on using, for example, three tokens a year and, despite having to suffer periods of chastity of 4 months, it could postpone permanent chastity for a very long time!
In the regime I hypothesized, however, the slave knows that all the cards will be destroyed in a relatively short time (there are only 54 cards) and, therefore, especially if the slave is young, he knows that his abstinence will be very long and very cruel.
For example, sissy slave m will turn 40 in January and by applying this method with choice of the monthly card she would begin her eternal chastity before she turns 45!
As if that weren’t enough, this system does not at all guarantee the slave to actually enjoy all his last orgasms.
The Mistress, in fact, at each draw, will give her evaluation of the slave and, given the high standards rightly required by many of us, it is very likely that numerous cards will be destroyed without even being turned, leaving the slave with the doubt that he has lost one of her latest pathetic but precious orgasms.
Precisely this perspective, then, will be a further incentive for the slave to be absolutely and totally obedient in the periods between the two draws, in the hope that the card of the month will not be destroyed.
The Mistresses who, like me and many of those who write on the blog, expose their slave to other people, then, can make everything more fun, faster and more cruel at the same time.
The Mistress could, in fact, invite the people to whom the slave is exposed to the ceremony … for example friends, lovers, relatives and the like.
Even these guests would choose, one after the other, a card for the slave and they too would give the judgment.
In this case the slave would have the advantage of trying more cards in a single month; but the disadvantages would be many!
In the event of negative judgments, in fact, even the guest cards would be destroyed without being turned over (in my case I struggle a lot to imagine my mother giving a positive opinion …)
In case of positive judgments they would be turned around and then destroyed.
This could greatly speed up the card run out time.
If, then, in these situations, a card of hearts is drawn before everyone has given their judgment, it would still end with the judgments and, in case of favorable judgments, the remaining cards would be put back in the deck, while in case of judgments negative would, of course, be destroyed.
If you get to the last card of the deck without knowing if all the hearts cards have been destroyed, the Mistress could then give the slave the possibility to choose whether to turn the card over or not.
If he chooses to turn and the card is of hearts, he can have his last orgasm and then face his perennial chastity.
If he chooses not to flip the card but to wait a very long term (e.g. 5 years), then the card would be kept and turned over after the indicated period.
If the card were of hearts, the Mistress would leave her orgasm to the slave and then grant him one orgasm every, for example, two or three or five years.
If the card wasn’t of hearts, well, it’s a shame for the slave …
As I wrote, I took a cue for this idea from a story read on the internet some time ago and that the post we are commenting on reminded me.
I confess that to imagine this regime and to think of it applied to sissy slave m. I was very excited, however I don’t know if I will really decide to use this system or if it will remain just an idea.
Your views and suggestions would of course be appreciated.
A warm greeting
Francesca
I confess i am not sure what system you actually propose. It seems your idea turned into a stream of consciousness of options.
I thought the essence of your system is described in the following paragraph, but I do not understand ‘the slave will not know until the end’. The end of what?
If the evaluation is favorable, the card is turned over, otherwise it is destroyed without even being seen and the slave will not know until the end if the destroyed card was of hearts and, therefore, if one of his few last orgasms was destroyed with it.
After the card has been turned over, the slave suffers the punishment for that specific card as per the old rules.
If the card is destroyed without being turned over, the slave’s punishment is that foreseen for the worst of the cards.
Dear Scarlet,
I am sorry that the explanation of my idea was unclear.
Unfortunately, my poor English creates great difficulties in the translation phase and I have certainly included too many options and variables that have made me lose the central concept.
I will try to simplify my idea as much as possible:
The slave is left with only 13 orgasms before being held in chastity forever.
He can have these orgasms when he draws a heart card from a 52-card deck.
Every month the slave comes before the Mistress and humbly asks to be able to extract a card from the deck.
If the Mistress feels that the slave has rendered satisfactory service in the previous month, then she authorizes the slave to choose a card from the deck.
If the chosen card is of hearts, the slave can have his orgasm, otherwise not.
Each month the selected card is destroyed after being turned over.
When there are no more heart cards left in the deck, the slave is placed in chastity for the rest of his life.
If the Mistress feels that the slave has not rendered a satisfactory service in the preceding month, then she does not grant the slave the right to draw the card and try his luck.
In this case, the Mistress simply destroys a card from the deck without showing it to the slave.
In this way the slave loses his monthly chance to try his luck and will never know, until the end of the game, if the card destroyed without being turned over was one that allowed him to orgasm.
As I said, when all the heart cards have been destroyed, no more orgasms. Forever.
In my opinion this method adds to the countdown effect the fact that the slave cannot decide when to have his orgasms and the fact that, if the Mistress gives the slave negative monthly evaluations, the slave also loses one of his rare possibilities.
I hope that in this way the idea is clearer.
A greeting
Mistress Francesca
I fully understand.
At the heart of this is the sadistic desire of destroying and removing hope…you knowing that your slave knows it’s in your gift, but your pleasure of their suffering is more important. Their sacrifice for their love of you.
Which ever method is used it is a simple cat and mouse game….and the cat will torment at it’s leisure and pleasure until it’s bored, then finish the game…..
Hello Ms scarlet and Francesca,
I am a new mistress and have newly introduced my husband to FLR. I am able to train him and to do this I keep him nude all the time, irrespective of who is there at house.
But is nudity mandatory to achieve long term results.
I pity him.. He sometimes does the same chores as maids.. alongside them but only in cage.
I haven’t shown my pity side to him.. for him I am strict with cane. Since we have just started two months back, he gets his ass red even for slightest mistakes… but had second thoughts
Nudity is not mandatory. I can’t imagine where you got that idea from?
You have maids as well as a submissive husband??
If he is a true submissive, he will not sleep well if shown a great deal of pity.
The definition of a submissive:
For the purposes of this blog, a submissive is someone who cannot be truly content both sexually, and as a whole, unless they feel helplessly in the power of another.
IT IS A SEXUALITY ; in the same way being a gay male is a sexuality. It is not a choice. A submissive will usually discover he or she is a submissive before they reach puberty. Most often between the ages of 7 and 11.
While playing child’s games with others, they will volunteer to be the captured victim who gets to be tied up! They fantasise, even at a very young age, of being helplessly in the power of another, who is usually a bit mean, and there will be a sexual element.
As an adult, if their sexual partner does not dominate them, they will not be content with their sex life or with their life overall.
If you question that the submissives I have described exist at all, or that there are very many of them, I ask you; … why do you think all around the world, there are hundreds of thousands of women who work as a dominatrix to meet the vast demand.
Now comes the bit that many find hard to understand. How the mind of a submissive works.
The submissive mind is at first difficult to understand and seemingly paradoxical. The submissive must be coerced to endure things they do not like in order for them to feel truly dominated; validation that they are not in control. If a man consents to everything you do to him, then he is really the one that is in control, and he will feel discontented and ill at ease being the one in control.
If you really love your submissive partner, you must accept they need you to take control and to do some ‘wicked’ things. If you say, ‘ … but I love them too much to be wicked to them‘, well, I would say, if you love them a lot, you will not deny them what they need, nor try, fruitlessly, to ‘cure’ them.
There are limits to this phenomenon. While they feel deeply submissive, (and deeply in awe of you), while enduring theses things they do not like, there will be other things that they do not like, that DO NOT make them feel submissive and stop them feeling submissive. These are their hard limits that have to be respected for the relationship to endure. BUT, sometimes some of their hard limits can erode over time.
In parallel, over time, the dominant may become more dominant and more wicked and this may be to do with changes to hard limits or it may be activities that were not restricted by hard limits, but could grow. For instance, spanking with a hairbrush instead of the bare hand. I mention this phenomenon because YOU WILL come across things on the internet, (or fantasies of your submissive), relating to this lifestyle, that you are very uncomfortable with. But you are in charge; so if there is something you don’t want to do, you don’t have to do it!
You might be amazed at how you evolve over weeks, months and years! Rather than thinking; I will never be comfortable with that! Think instead, I’m not comfortable with that, I wonder if I will be in months or years to come?
Thanks Mistress scarlet for the quick revert. As of now we have a maid as well as husband.. I just wanted to be sure that he would be able to manage his chores as per standards hence I didn’t go for an option without maids.
I think gradually he will learn.. As of this week I have enforced nudity but if he is good then I may be lenient later.
Your comment has helped me to a certain extent.. definitely not showing pity for the time ahead..
Looking forward to be amazed at evolving over weeks.. months…
Please keep me informed of progress and any issues on which you would like advice from myself, and the other experienced Dommes that are so helpful to the community.
Really appreciate your help Mistress Scarlet..
Just to add on my thoughts I think enforced nudity should be mandatory for first few months of FLR.
This is because I believe keeping men naked burns their ego and I as a mistress have better control on my sub.
This is reply to the previous post on is nudity mandatory for FLR
One of the reasons nudity is not mandatory for FLR is because nothing is mandatory. All decisions are up to the Mistress and Mistresses are all different. For instance, there is clothing far more more powerful that nudity to burn a male’s ego, such as; plain maid outfit, sissy maid outfit, parody of a schoolgirl outfit, parody of a little girl outfit, etc. But nudity can be a good place to start as one thing that is guaranteed is that, over the years, the Mistress will evolve in both her tastes and the activities she enjoys and employs. I very much look forward to more updates from you. Keep safe.
I have a query this may not be the right blog, but I want my husband to be in FLR..
He is there but not completely there in FLR.
Can you advise some tips and traits
I suggest you read my BDSM Manual.
Hello Ms Scarlet,
I read your BDSM Manual and need tell that it was quite insightful. Below are the changes which I have immediately implemented.
1. I am going to follow ultra strict mode.
2. We dont have any safewords now.
3. Enforced nudity
4. My younger sister knows about my Domination but she doesnt know about FLR, I plan to call her over this weekend and introduce her to Domination and flr, she is getting married early next year.
5. I will now stop at punishments when I feel its enough for him.
Your book helped a lot
Still deciding on what different punishments can be given.. apart from spanking and chores..
All sounds like you are finding your personal style of domination, like we all do over time, (Although it will evolve over the months and years!).
Please let me know how it goes with your sister and what you decide about the different punishments.
Hello Miss Scarlet,
Here is what I have in mind for weekend, feel free to add your inputs and guide me.
I prefer to keep him all nude but in neck and hand restrains. This way his hands are kept in slave position and above the ass. I used this because whenever I decided to spank, his hands used to come in between.
I have decided to call my sister and introduce her to flr and thereafter have a naked interrogation round in afternoon where he will kneel with restraints and I shall be ultra strict and my sister shall be ultra sexy sitting on chair on his left and right sides with him in between. My sister has seen him ogling at her. We plan to confront him.. If he accepts then he gets punished / spanked by me with a cane. if he doesnt then my sister shall punish / spank him for lying with a whip… We have created a list of such questions where either answer gets him spanked..
Lately he has been back answering and struggling a lot in restrains… hence we plan to give him mouthsoaping punishment and keep him in backyard with a humler.
I think this should make him more submissive, my sister arrives tomorrow evening.. let me know if you have any better ideas.
Also plz let me know if there are any other similar forums.
Miss June
I am very much looking forward to your report of the weekend.
I’m afraid I don’t know of any other blogs where REAL LIFE Dommes in long term relationships share ideas. That is the reason I started this blog.
If you find one, please let me know.
My wife and key holder as decided to implement this regime after reading it .
I am 63 and been locked for a long time now nearly 10 years . However she has changed it slightly. I have still been given 50 tokens and as above can surrender one as and when I need to, but if I want her to dress in lingerie or any fetish clothing it will cost me 5 tokens and if I want her to do it for me it will cost 5 tokens, and both together will cost 15 tokens, so I can easily run down my balance . At the moment I still have all 50 intact but it will not be long before I am tempted
Interesting
My wife has commenced a much crueller regime. She is a big fan of yours and owns and reads your Manual, but what I’ll describe below is her own inspiration.
We have tried FLR on and off for 15 years, the latest though is full on metal chastity but has only lasted three weeks so far.
6 days ago, she bit my neck and told me to kneel. I had a mini ejaculation in my cage which she made me clean after she’d stopped laughing.
Yesterday she summoned me to her and asked if I’d like to kiss her, as I leaned forward she pulled away laughing. I again had a small accident, not a full twitch but definitely ejaculate and not pre cum.
She has now concluded that if I’ll come not matter how small from verbal and physical abuse that will be my only release for the foreseeable future. No idea how long that will be, I suspect it won’t change.
I would love to hear from anyone else who has a similar experience or arrangement.
Thanks for your inspiring manual by the way.
This is one of the greatest chastity dynamics I’ve ever heard of and I just passed it along to my dominant.
Yep, we all agree on that! I will soon be posting on the collection of comments I have received about it. A number of Mistresses have decided to adopt the dynamic with various twists from each Mistress, including me.
Hello Miss Scarlet,
I require your help. As discussed we are in full time FLR realtionship but he sometimes disobeys a direct order. I punish him in various ways including spanking and exposed nudity but somewhere it’s not working.
Lately I am facing disciplinary issues and back answering from him.
Can you please suggest 5 to 6 few stern punishments which should make him more submissive.
Thanks in advance
I beleive the issue may be that the punishments do not continue until he begs with all his heart or them to stop, then you still continue for a little longer. A punishment must be a bit more than he thinks he take, whatever that punishment is. Also he must truly fear it happening again. MY BDSM MANUAL