Brief descent to misery

I have found for bitch-boy and I that there are brief moments, perhaps lasting a maximum of 10 seconds, when very intense emotions are ignited for both the submissive and the dominant. For the submissive; the very intense feelings of total helplessness and profound despair, and for the dominant; very intense feelings of power and decadent pitilessness. These brief moments are when a terrible thing is imminently, almost certainly going to happen, and the submissive loses any last vestiges of dignity and begs and pleads as pathetically as he ever does.

I wonder, (A) do others feel these emotions in the circumstances I am about to describe, and (B) do others have examples of activities or moments I haven’t listed when the BREIF DESCENT TO MISERY phenomenon arises?

There is not always an actual verbal countdown but there is sometimes. I will give some examples.

Example 1

I have him on the stomping stage and he has not cum for weeks and weeks. I have my shoe in position for giving him an orgasm and I have told him all day that today he might get to cum. He MIGHT.

I begin the required backward and forward movement with his defect under the sole of my shoe. It is not the most arousing feeling in the world for him and it usually takes around a minute before he cums; if I have decided to allow that. The BREIF DESCENT TO MISERY phenomenon begins if, after perhaps only 10 or 15 seconds, I begin to shake my head slowly and pull an expression of reluctance to continue. Then he begins continuous, panicky, utterly sincere and respectful pleading and I keep moving my shoe back and forward while I verbalise that, NO, having reflected on the matter, there will be no cumming today. It’s not going to happen. Amazingly the continuous, panicky, utterly sincere and respectful pleading becomes even more panicky until I stop moving my shoe. But the emotions for both of us are so intense from the moment he has perceived I have decided not to let him cum. Deliciously intense for me.

Example 2

A common occurrence for me is when I have the Linnex applicator in one hand and bitch-boy’s stiff little defect in the other and he is very securely and helplessly bound. A stripe of the nasty Linnex wax takes about four minutes to begin to start the burning sensation. Despite his continuous panicky pleading, I give one generous stripe of wax to the shaft and then I ask if I should give a second.

It is fair to say I almost never give just one stripe, but that doesn’t stop more continuous panicky pleading from him. After I have ‘mulled’ the decision over for a short while, (savouring his pleading a great deal), I decide, YES, a second stripe is to be applied and I apply it. Now comes the most intense emotions when I ask him if it should get a third stripe. I do not always apply a third stripe. I do perhaps on 75% of occasions. His continuous, panicky, utterly sincere and respectful pleading is off-the-scale, I string out this phase, umming-and-ahhing, and then my body language and demeanour indicate there will be a third stripe. (This will increase the burning pain over the next 40 minutes by 33%.) He and I both know I have made my decision but for the 10 or so seconds before I apply the third stripe, he continues his panicky, utterly sincere and respectful pleading and in those moments of around 10 seconds for both of us, things are REAL; REALLY REAL! The BREIF DESCENT TO MISERY phenomenon. (A fourth stripe or the dreaded knob-head coating, is sometimes added after the third stripe.)

Example 3

Not something I do anymore, because I am afraid bitch-boy only ever gets to cum under the sole of my shoe now; but the previous regimen for his orgasms was by using my skilled hands while he was bound helpless on the bed. I would always start by giving him the impression he was going to get to cum, but around 50% of the times, I would suddenly announce, NO, not today and I would start a verbal countdown; usually from fifteen down to zero. The BREIF DESCENT TO MISERY phenomenon was then in play as he would begin his emotional, continuous, panicky, utterly sincere and respectful pleading all the way to zero when I would stop wanking him. and release my grip. What a gloriously intense fifteen seconds.

Example 4

There are several videos on Pornhub showing orgasm denied males given the chance to cum by fucking a blow-up sex doll within a time limit. When the countdown timer has about 30 seconds left of the allowed period, the Domme pulls the plug valve plug from the doll and the doll begins to deflate. Despite the male trying even harder than ever, the outcome is clear to him and the Domme. The BREIF DESCENT TO MISERY phenomenon is now in play for 10 or 20 seconds, as he is trying so hard in the quickly inflating doll until the Domme finally pulls the flat polythene doll from the bed, and from the sub’s defect.


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35 thoughts on “Brief descent to misery

  1. Wow! So hot. I’m afraid I can’t contribute any examples from my own experience but was tremendously affected reading these accounts, feeling a longing as I struggled to erect in my cage. Thank you for posting.

  2. Oh Mistress, another devine post. I once knelt in front of a Mistress, blind folded awaiting a kick to the balls, she allowed me to beg for 30 seconds for her to change her mind( I begged like mad as I knew how much it would hurt, even though I knew I would get kicked it didn’t stop me feeling terrified and hoping she would change her mind,even though deep down i knew she never would. I can only imagine the power you must feel having bitch boy begging you even though it won’t make a blind bit of difference

      1. Yea Mistress she was. Still not in your league though Mistress. Your legs are perfect and your ideas on femdom fit so well with mine. You are a slaves dream or nightmare

  3. Would love to see some of the videos you describe, maybe I am not searching right, but genuine amateur femdom videos seem quite sparse on porn-sites.

      1. That’s an awesome video and great story thank you! I found it incredibly sexy to see how she locked him back-up again and to see him struggle fanatically against the odds after she pulled the plug. How cruel, knowing he would probably give about his left nut at that point just to cum, but there is no doubt about what will happen and not an ounce of remorse from her side, just mere laughter, reveling in the knowledge of how securely he is bound to her by his desire and the denial thereof. Simply amazing, I wish for a girlfriend like that. Though I am not sure if I won’t come to regret it afterwards..

  4. For me it’s when I have worked my sissy behind off all day cleaning and doing chores, cooking dinner, and giving her several orgasms. Then, when it’s time for me to get some relief, the click of the handcuffs starts the brief descent to misery as I beg and plead while she places the ball gag in my mouth, and starts to laugh. Her laughter is the last thing I hear as she quickly pushes me into the closet and closes the door.

  5. yes! that channel is amazing. sadly he seems to cum still more than bb. at least he’s allowed to ‘clean the pipes’ in your words. one of his ‘toys’ was a black doll of a dude. Definitely one of the best channels

  6. I don’t know how often BB thanks you for all that you do for him Ms Scarlet but I hope it is often, if not on the hour, every hour – he is one lucky sub!

  7. Yes Mistress Scarlet . I have not read every blog you have written but I have read many going back probably 6-8 years since I started receiving email updates .
    I like I suspect most who read are not at a confinement or control state that Yourself and Bitch boy are .
    In answer to your question do we eexperience this power surge / suction when interacting .
    I am a well ballanced mature individual with considerable Ds understanding

    When I am being confined by my Mistress or in my mistresses presence by a Dominant such as on or in a frame , on a bed , in a cage for instance that last moment of freedom when the last fixing is clicked I go into a frantic desire to be released , I am trying to condition to overcome this but its extreemly anxious .
    It lasts maybe minutes while shecalms me down sometimes I can do it myself but being left alone I can get very anxious , I need to break this barrier and I am working on it .

    1. ‘ …. a well balanced individual…’ ‘…that last moment of freedom when the last fixing is clicked I go into a frantic desire to be released….’
      Not exactly well balanced Andy. LOL.

      When you are without freedom, what is the worst thig that can REALLY happen?

  8. Good morning from Florida Ms. Scarlet. I’m writing you today to get a better insight on some issues I’m having. I’m 27, and my wife is 25. We’ve been married now a year, and together almost 5.
    I’ve introduced FLR and she’s been somewhat receptive, however sadly I was a bit eager for her to give me chores and load up the work, which ended up being a chore for her. I’m not in chastity (would love to be), but I don’t think she’d be into that. I don’t masturbate secretly, and only cum in her presence. I do rub her feet nightly.

    Point of post: How can I guide her into being more of a dominate wife? I don’t need her to be mean or bossy all the time, but more often would be a dream. Perhaps she’s perfect and I’m the issue..

    With love!

    1. You have sadly made the classic error of taking charge, of being in control, your wife has been denied the feeling of having absolute power. She must be wondering what on earther Dommes get from being dominant. Having power and being totally in charge is a huge power rush and arousing. She has zero idea what being totally in charge is like.
      Have a read of THIS.

      And read as much of my small alternative blog as possible; because then;

      then beg with all your heart to have her read this page of my alternative blog.

      Come back to me with any questions you have.

      1. Goodness I can’t believe I made that mistake! Thank you for taking the time to enlighten me , and help correct my behavior. Your blog is great. So much wisdom and brilliant pieces of literature. I will definitely be around for many years Ms. Scarlet.

    2. If I could give you some advice being I’ve made many past mistakes with this. Slowing down would be the main thing. I wish I could go back in time and let my wife evolve better at her own pace. I could only imagine how far we would’ve gotten if I did that. Females have a lot of natural dominance in them and we have to let that take form. What you could do in the meantime is enjoy being submissive in the things that she IS allowing you to do. The foot massages you speak of are a start, but don’t get caught up in feeling you need to have an orgasm when you are feeling submissive with her. Orgasms are not a submissive’s friend. I’ve learned to withhold from having them even if my wife is involved because alot of times when females are just starting out with dominance they are not going to deny you an orgasm themselves. You have to make her understand that you feel better and are more into her the longer you hold out. Embrace the feeling that you love whats happening in the moment, you are totally turned on, but you aren’t worthy of having an orgasm any time you please. If you could then incorporate her receiving orgasms through oral sex from you whenever she pleases and you still waiting long periods of time for your own I think you will be a step ahead of the game towards an FLR. The real dominance, though she may partake in some light fun stuff cause she knows you like it, will take a long time to develop with a female who’s not used to that it seems. But like I said, take your time. The worst mistakes I made led to us not doing anything at all and I’d rather be at the stage of the nightly foot massage thing than nothing. Feel submissive to the max she’s allowing always and let her lead the way which direction it’s going to go in. If you have what they call “blue balls” from the constant edging, you will naturally give her all the attention in the world therefore treating her like a Goddess because you know she is the only source of any kind of relief for yourself. This will further put you in that 24/7 submissive state you crave. Hope this helps. I’m still learning as I go, but wish I was as young as you trying this again. Good luck

      1. I would make one point on John’s comment. I suggest you do not say ‘….you aren’t worthy….’ To a novice almost still vanilla wife, such words as worthy can ignite all sorts of unhelpful alarm bells in her mind. Perhaps better to say, ‘she affects you so much with her growing dominace you don’t want to spoil the feelings she gives you be having orgasms too close together.

        1. Thank you Mrs. Scarlet for responding. Thank you John for taking time to give your opinion as well. I agree that taking things slow is important. There are times that I want desperately to be in chastity, but then there are times I’m glad that I’m not. In some sense, be careful what you wish for. I’ve taken a lot of time today to reflect on ways that I can improve without it being about me, and solely putting my wife first. I want to approach this with empathy like Mrs. Scarlet instructed. I cum usually twice a week, but can live with once a week. I’d love to get to the point where it’s every other week, but once again, baby steps. Mrs. Scarlet if there’s any chores or gestures I can do to help her feel like the royalty she is, please instruct. Your knowledge is truly so powerful.

          1. Thank you for the kind words.
            Will you be asking her to read the page of my alternative blog I suggested? I suggest tiny ways she can get to feel real power and this is so important.

            Presents like flowers for no reason would be good, or doing a chore she would not expect you to do. But it is not all one way. If she does something dominant that makes you feel submissive you must reward her with a gift or some other thing she will like and tell her why. She must see that when she makes you feel submissive you are affected and feel tangibly grateful.

            1. Thank you for the response Ms. Scarlet. I woke up at 4am to read your comment! I will gradually incorporate your alternative blog.

              I get her fresh flowers every week. I do majority of the housework, she enjoys cooking sometimes, so when she does, I clean. Almost every morning I leave her a hand written letter by the coffee pot, (this is her favorite thing). I tell her often in the letters how much I love her being in control and giving her power over me.

              I guess my issue is I’d like my wife to be more dominant, but I need to be patient. It’s not about my pleasure, we move at her pace. Patience is something I struggle with so perhaps this is a great opportunity to improve. Once again thank you for taking the time to write to me, I feel privileged.

              1. Regarding your issue, that is why I pointed you to a specific page of my alternative blog for her to read. It was carefully crafted after much consultation.
                Remember your worship levels must significantly go up in response to an act of dominance on her part. If she gets a huge amount of worship for doing nothing dominant at all that is a mixed message for her. So basic levels of worship 24/7/365 leaving enough worship levels free to ramp the worship up in response to an act of dominance on her part.

                1. Thank you Ms. Scarlet. I will share the article with my wife.

                  I have a question that I’m sure with your experience you’ve encountered before. I would reduce my amount of orgasms if she asked me to, but I really enjoy cumming. I also suffer from the post effects where within two hours I’m eager again. Right now I only have orgasms every 3-4 days. None are vaginal. I usually lay on the floor, and she jacks me off. The last time was 2 days ago. Her feet were resting on my chest. She instructed that I not cum on her feet, which is my favorite thing to do. Secretly I want to cum in my face, but I haven’t told her that before. I don’t want to spook her. When I came, I had a huge load and it shot all the way to my neck and landed on her feet. I was happy and wanted to lick them clean (didn’t say that however), but she instructed I get a paper towel and wipe them. My question is: Do I need to reduce my orgasms or is my timeframe okay? I am only 27, so there is plenty of time to reduce them over the years. Also how can I discreetly mention that I want to cum in my face or even eat cum? Thank you for your insight Madam.

                  1. I would say do not reduce them yet. SEE THIS POST.

                    So I can gauge your Mistress. What would she say if you asked if you could fuck her instead of her using her hands?

                    Until I have a real gauge of your Mistress’s feelings about femdom I cannot advise on the last question. And I would not advise anyway until you advise me how she reacts to the page on my alternative blog I suggested you ask her to read.

                    1. We typically have sex once or twice a week. She’ll ask me to go down on her. Once she is satisfied she will ride on top of me until she orgasms 2-3 times. After a few minutes of recovery, she then will instruct me to lay down on the floor or sometimes kneel in the shower. If in the shower I jack off, if on the floor she will do it. She wouldn’t care if I asked her to fuck her until I came, she might be too sore or she might oblige. Personally I enjoy the other ways because I love being at her feet.
                      In regards to the blog post there are a few things that would turn her off BADLY, which she has mentioned before, cross dressing being one of them. Really anything along the lines of a sissy husband. She loves that I’m strong, and athletic.

                      Her feelings are she’s growing into it. I now have a running chore list, and sometimes she bosses me around the house. I wouldn’t say she’s ready to lock my cock in chastity or cuckold me, but she’s growing more dominate each day. Thank you for taking the time to write me back I really appreciate it. Seriously I do. I need this advice.

                    2. I have a great fear for your success and have to be brutally honest with you. My feeling is you are unable to listen to women, or take advice on board, despite your words to the contrary as to my expertise. Or perhaps you are not good at communicating. Or both. I don’t think you have actually confirmed you will be following one piece of my advice. It comes across that you know best. Is that how your wife feels?

                      Particularly the key issue of remembering your worship levels must significantly go up in response to an act of dominance on her part. That if she gets a huge amount of worship for doing nothing dominant at all, that is a mixed message for her. So there should be only basic levels of worship 24/7/365, leaving enough higher worship levels free to ramp the worship up in response to an act of dominance on her part.

                      And I have suggested she read a specific page of my alternative blog. A page that has worked well for many submissives in your position. Your response is cross dressing references and sissy stuff would put her off and she loves you are strong and athletic.

                      There are no references to cross dressing and sissy stuff on this page. There is one reference that having him in panties, If it would amuse you to have a male submissive in frilly panties, instead of naked, go for it!, and a similar reference to a plain or frilly apron while he does his chores if it would make him feel submissive. BUT, the page begins with the following:

                      A Very Important Rule
                      This is a rule for you! There are a myriad of different activities enjoyed when people enjoy dominance and submission. It is important to understand immediately that many activities you come across will not be for you. (At least not to start with; you might be surprised how you evolve!)
                      So do not throw the baby out with the bathwater. The internet may well have many things you are uncomfortable with. When you see something that makes you uncomfortable, remind yourself it takes all sorts, and then move along to what you are comfortable with.

                      And the home page has this within it:
                      FOUR: This attribute is frequently misunderstood. Most submissives are very intelligent and very strong individuals. When the domination is paused, they will be your knight in shining armour when you need that. They will be great company when you are on a night out, or watching TV at home. You simply tell them that, until further notice, you will be using them for their vanilla company and there will be no indication from them they are submissive. Yes, YOU HAVE THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS!

                      I will expand on this attribute a little as it is so important and so often unappreciated. I may spend several evenings a week being dominant and perhaps whole weekends now and again. I may also have given my husband a number of regular housework chores that are always his responsibility, BUT, there may be vanilla events that are important to me. A great TV series on every Monday, or a box set to binge. Or a night out with friends or relatives to enjoy with him.

                      I will tell my husband that I will not be dominating him that evening or weekend of vanilla activity and I will be using him for his vanilla company. He will not act submissively and I will enjoy his company.

                      Equally a problem may appear in our lives that needs sorting; perhaps financial or with a neighbour or work related. We all have problems that come up from time to time. Wonderfully, my husband will automatically drop his submissive role and together we will sort the problem.

                      Finally, on this topic; if say, we are holidaying abroad, and perhaps we unexpectedly end up in a dodgy part of town, there is no submissiveness evident in my husband. On the contrary, he is my knight in shining armour, my assertive protector. I feel safe with him by my side.

                      So yes, YOU HAVE THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS! A submissive you dominate when you decide and all the benefits that come with that, and an assertive problem solver when you need that and great vanilla company when you need that.

    3. Mistress Scarlet…I’m sorry I didn’t mention this in my first comment. I was giving him the advice from
      a submissive male’s point of view. In no way did I mean that your advice to him wasn’t suffice. You are definitely the authority on giving instruction on how to evolve a D/s relationship and I’ve failed many of your lessons I’m sorry to say. Not to any of your fault with the instruction but to a lot of which I mentioned in my own advice. Seems too many submissive males want to rush things along or push their own fantasies onto their partner. I’ve sadly done the same in my past and luckily I’m getting another chance with my wife right now. We are moving along gradually this time, AT HER PACE. The only pace that matters. Thank you for being here for us

  9. Thank you for taking the time to respond Ms. Scarlet. I do appreciate you sharing your insight.
    • I think it is a bit harsh to assume I don’t listen to women, or that my communication skills are lacking. That is your opinion and you are entitled to it.
    • The part about your husband not being submissive at certain times was refreshing to hear. As someone starting out into this lifestyle you rarely hear about the submissiveness ever stopping. My wife and I own a cafe together, and also had recently a newborn son, so it’s hard sometimes to be D/s when there are many things requiring your responsibility and attention.
    • Lastly, I wasn’t discrediting or ignoring your alternative blog post. I read it, and appreciated its literary brilliance. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to respond. You mentioned that you fear my success, and that is understandable, however I am optimistic. Much love.

    1. I didn’t assume, I had a feeling based on my experience of not having any idea at all what you had taken from our exchanges, despite the amount and extent of those exchanges. As I fear for your success because of this issue, I hoped by expressing my feeling it would prompt you to do some self reflection. It seems I failed in that hope. In the past I have always had material feedback from subs in your position and that helped me tailor my ongoing responses.

      I have a personal goal to help as many wives and girlfriends of submissive males as I can, experience the addictive feeling of having REAL power and become addicted to using and abusing that power. That usually leads to the formation of a wonderful symbiotic relationship with both parties profoundly contented. I have helped many such relationships get that. If ever your wife would like to email me with any questions or concerns, please let me know.

      1. I have done some self reflecting, and I am prepared to listen more than I speak. Two ears, one mouth. Please do not be fearful, instead optimistic. Within the past few days of reading your blog and speaking with you, our D/s relationship has become much better. That is owed to you, and for that I am thankful. Sorry for being difficult before, I’m still in training, and really need a strong woman in my life to help guide me.

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