bb finally allowed an erection AND relief

I know many of you like to have updates on what goes on in my house. (I know some don’t but you can skip this post).

Used in the holes of his tube earlier in the day before the tube came off.

I released his little birth defect and the little thing stayed hard, despite it enduring several very painful ‘treatments’

Well, at the end of a very, very tough day yesterday, for my bb, he got to have an erection and cum! after 13 weeks and 5 days denial of both. (3 months!) I lost count of the number of massive orgasms I had yesterday because I was being so especially mean. Seriously mean! My legs were a bit shaky by the end. After around 6 hours of bb being abused,

before he was finally secured under the Stomping Stage. With his defect poking through the hole, it was further abused

and then brought off under the sole of my shoe. Unlike in the photo

I was naked apart from shoes, tiny hot-pants and my gold waist chain. It took less than a minute of rubbing and he was so emotional for a full five minutes. I chuckled mockingly. Pathetic!

He was locked straight back up in his tube immediately the filth had been spilt. And reminded the six week minimum denial period for both orgasms AND erections started forthwith. So 7 August is when the six weeks is up. Who knows, perhaps it will be that day, or more likely, 2 to 6 months after 7 August as I pointed out to him.

28 thoughts on “bb finally allowed an erection AND relief

  1. Lucky bb! I hope he was suitably grateful.

    (the updates from your daily life are my favourite thing about your blog, please don’t stop writing them)

  2. Ah finally some relief for bb. Thank you for the update Ms Scarlet, as you know this news was very much awaited in our household.

    As promised my subby too will get his release but it has to be delayed by a few more days, not that I care much! Unlike your bitch boy who seems to be very handy, my bitch is rather pathetic when it comes to diy and building stuff, hence we had to order a ‘stomping bench’ online and it hasn’t arrived yet. So a few more days of fretting for him, on one hand he is so relieved that he’ll get to come soon and on the other he’s terrified that it will be under the sole of my shoes. Slaves cannot win, can they?

  3. I’m so confused by the comment you made that some people don’t care to hear about updates as they relate to you and BB. Not the comment itself that’s confusing but by the fact that that’s the case. Its curious why there arent any comments so far, its been 2 days! Oh well, is what it is. My wife and I are quite the opposite. We pretty much like all the blog posts, especially the details that provide a deeper look into your lives. I mean, all the the Mistresses that write in as well as yourself are living examples of what we all could have. I ly which there was more. What’s the point of reading this blog if not to read those? Anyway to each their own I guess. Thanks for all the work you out into this and using your wonderful ability to write.

  4. Mistress Scarlet,

    please allow me to congratulate you on the (relatively) new regime of chastity and denial you have adopted for your slave, and for keeping him without any erections or arousal now for over three months.

    I strongly believe that slaves should be completely sexless, and our lives should consist of nothing but hard work, training, humiliation and punishment. For a slave like me to entertain any sexual thoughts at all is disgusting and wrong. Our birth defects – as you so rightly call them – should always be locked up in cages small enough to prevent any kind of erection.

    Not only does total denial of arousal deepen our feelings of inferiority, sexual irrelevance and worthlessness, it fills us with an even greater need to serve and intensifies our desire to become truly useful and obedient servants. We can concentrate more fully on our work thanks to the absence of sexual distractions, and we also have more energy which can be directed to serving our owners and superiors, instead of wasted on fantasies.

    I am sure you will find, as you continue this new regime, that your slave becomes even more devoted and literally worships you as a higher being. As you extend the period of his denial, he will feel even more inferior and submissive towards you, until he literally worships you and does his utmost to serve you every single day.

    For a slave, denial of erections on a long term basis is a formidable and daunting challenge. As well as the most intense frustration, there will be times when he experiences feelings of sadness almost akin to grief at the loss of his penis as a sexual organ, helplessness and total emasculation.

    Occasionally this may also lead to resentment, or even bitterness, but if this is dealt with appropriately, he will soon move beyond this sense of unfairness to a state of acceptance, and finally he will become submissive at a very profound level. He will find true fulfilment and happiness as he is able to embrace his submission completely.

    You are giving him a great gift by helping him to attain an even deeper level of subservience and live according to his true nature, as a real slave without any sexual feelings. He should be extremely grateful.

    Please excuse such a long and rambling comment, once again.

    In admiration, and awe,

    slave 307

  5. Ms. Scarlet,
    I am wondering if you agree with slave 307’s vision of a path to complete submission via total sexual denial. Or, do you think that a slave that knows there is no chance of ever being allowed sexual relief, might stop performing tasks which he thinks increase the chance of being rewarded with relief? Do you think that the hope of relief, even if never fulfilled, would make for a more productive, obedient slave? A rat that has been trained to press a bar to get a food pellet will press that bar indefinitely even if it never gets a pellet. A slave, who is told that no “pellet” will ever appear, might lose interest and stop pressing. At that point, a Mistress might have to switch from the carrot to the stick.

    1. In my experience, (a), when told he will never again have sexual relief the sub falls into a state of deep awe of his mistress making him deeply submissive and obedient, and (b), the sun becomes fixated on a lesser treat’ like being allowed to caress her butt or breasts for a few minutes, and these treats can be granted or denied according to performance and (c), anyway a sub can be controlled entirely by ‘stick’ if necessary or preferred, with no carrot ever.

  6. Thank once again you for your wisdom, Mistress Scarlet. As always, you put things so clearly and succinctly. So much better than I possibly could.

    From my perspective, the longer it goes on, total denial of any arousal only increases my need to be submissive and my feelings of awe and veneration towards women.

    It is exactly as you say: instead of hoping for impossible sexual ‘rewards’, my focus turns to more minimal pleasures such as the hope of being used as a footrest or being slapped in the face, or any chance at all to have the slightest physical contact.

    Even objects that have been in contact with a woman’s body such as her boots or shoes become objects of worship for me and cleaning or touching them provides me with a sensation that is close to joy.

    My submission only intensifies, and I experience feelings of genuine awe and insignificance in the presence of my female superiors. My desire to please them is never greater. My inability to become aroused or erect releases an even greater determination to work for them as hard as I can.

    I end up feeling something close to gratitude for being so completely denied, as it allows me to reach a deeper level of subservience and come closer to fulfilling my only real purpose in life: being a useful slave.

    1. Yes, a true submissive used And treated with serious pitiless ruthlessness becomes deeply in awe of and so grateful to their owner for providing such an unambiguous existence of forced exploitation suffering and submission.

      1. Mistress Scarlet,

        I humbly apologise in advance for the long nature of this post. I will obviously understand if you choose not to publish it. After all, it is only the opinion of a slave, and therefore inherently worthless, and it is probably far too long and tedious for your readers, especially your female readers, to waste time on.

        In my defence, this is a subject I feel so strongly about that I can’t contain myself. Your words are so inspiring that I could literally write volumes about each aspect of your post and every word of wisdom you set down.


        I can hardly put into words the happiness I feel as I read your words, Mistress. It is absolutely thrilling to know that there are truly dominant and superior women like you who fully understand your power over slaves like me and enjoy exploiting us and using us without mercy. That is exactly how we deserve to be treated.

        Women like yourself, Ms Anne, Mistress M, Mistress Francesca, Mistress Carla, are inspirational and heroic. It is a privilege to be able to read about your lives with your slaves, and even sometimes have the honour of conversing with you directly.

        As you have written many times before, the submissive can only find true happiness and fulfilment when he is completely in the power of a pitiless Mistress. This is a vitally important insight that could only come from a Mistress with a great understanding of the submissive mind.

        It is very difficult for people who are not genuinely submissive to understand, but a submissive – a genuine submissive – literally needs to serve, worship and obey.

        I feel deep in the core of my being that I was put on Earth to serve, and that I really am a lower form of life. My only purpose is to work for my superiors.

        It would be useless for me to try to deny this, even if I wanted to. But I don’t. It is so fundamental to what I am that it is impossible to imagine being otherwise. The sheer joy that I gain from submission is irreplaceable. When I cannot submit, I feel lost, restless, unfulfilled and even depressed.

        Of course I do not actually enjoy suffering, as such, but the deepest part of me craves and needs abuse and humiliation because I am a slave. The freedom of being able to fulfil my true purpose in life is beyond any other kind of happiness.

        It is not a sexual or romantic happiness, of course, but closer to a kind of spiritual ecstasy – the feeling of being your true self, in exactly the right place, fulfilling the one and only purpose of your life. Of everything being exactly as it should be.

        The Goddess, dominant, resplendent, living a life of sheer luxury and pleasure while you, her slave, a creature on the level of a worm or bug, work as hard as you possibly can to provide her with absolutely perfect service. The natural order.

        Being whipped or caned is painful. Being verbally abused or humiliated is shameful and horrible. Having to work all day long at tedious, demanding and repetitive tasks is exhausting and unpleasant. Being denied any kind of sexual arousal or pleasure for very long periods of time is almost unbearable.

        But for the slave all of these things are an integral part of the privilege of serving his Mistress and other superior women. The satisfaction of actually being able to live and work as a slave is a kind of fulfilment that is impossible to describe. It makes any kind of suffering and discomfort pale in comparison.

        In fact, the slave must be profoundly grateful for the suffering he is made to endure, no matter how painful or degrading it is, as this is an opportunity for him to provide further entertainment and even sadistic sexual pleasure to his owner and superiors.


        You mention a very interesting phenomenon in your description of bb’s latest release – that he became quite emotional for 5 minutes afterwards. This is partly due to the enormous sensation of relief that comes with orgasm after so long. The body feels such an intense release of tension that it can be overwhelming and cause the slave to sob or burst into tears.

        But there is another element as well. Immediately after orgasm, a slave experiences a period in which his submissive feelings recede for anything between a few minutes and several hours. During this period, he may become confused and think that what he is experiencing is a kind of clarity.

        He starts to evaluate just how hard his life is, how much work he has to do, how much he has to suffer, how much humiliation and shame he has to go through, and how little physical and sexual pleasure he is allowed.

        If he is not careful, he can become upset or even disobedient as he interprets these feelings of unfairness or resentment as the truth of his situation. In fact, this is just a temporary illusion, and his submissive nature will soon reassert itself, stronger then ever, and he will go back to feeling a desperate need to serve and obey.

        But it may be prudent to avoid this drop in his submissive feelings altogether. If he is actually allowed relief, the slave should be locked back into his penis cage immediately afterwards, and, before he can start to let his mind wander, sent off to complete several hours of hard, tedious and demanding work.

        By the time this task is completed to your satisfaction, he will be well on the way to regaining his natural state of total obedience and subservience, and there will be only a minimal dip in his performance as he starts his new period of denial, however long that may last.


        I also wanted to congratulate you on your choice of penis cage for your slave. Not only is the colour very humiliating and demeaning, but also the plastic material is very effective in denying sensation in the penis.

        In my experience, the CB line of devices with their plastic tubes shield the penis effectively and take away any sensation in the surface of the skin. This makes the slave’s frustration very intense indeed, even maddening, as he cannot feel any external sensation at all, except a kind of restrictive pressure.

        The feeling is deeply unsatisfying and his longing for any kind of contact or stimulation will rapidly become so intense that even punishment of the penis seems preferable to feeling nothing at all.


        Far be it from me ever to question your choice of words, Mistress. This is simply a matter of personal taste, but in some ways I prefer to apply the term ‘inferior’ to myself, rather than ‘submissive’, because while submissive implies a kind of orientation – and perhaps even a choice as to when and how to submit – being inferior is simply an inescapable fact, a status that cannot be changed.

        That feels closer to how I would describe myself. I feel – no, I know – that I am not really worthy to be considered human at all, more like a lower animal or even vermin.


        Once again, apologies for making this post so long and incoherent. I hope at least it might provide you with some amusement, Mistress.

        In total submission and gratitude,

        slave 307

        1. I agree with all you wrote except:
          1. I do not agree submissives are lower forms of life, certainly bb is not. But him being submissive does mean fir a woman like me he is helpless but to be a human toy and servant I can do literally whatever I want with. The fact that we both getting complete contentment from this, (although obviously he HATES so much of what happens to him), means the situation is a symbiosis. We both need each other for what we get from the symbiosis, but he has zero power and suffers greatly for his contentment , while I have 100% power and love every moment of my life. So not a lower form of life, but a needy and vulnerable addicted form of life.
          Submissive is an orientation like being gay. But it is not a choice. He can’t choose not to be submissive.

          2. A sub does not have to be grateful for his suffering. He has to be grateful that a dominant woman spends her time on him, but he can suffer with misery, sorrow and regret at the time. That is pleasing fir the Domme.

          3. In the experience of myself and other Mistrsses, if the sub has at least 3 week gaps between orgasms, the ‘downtime’ lasts only minutes, AND, I have found I can bring it to an end by actually employing mocking of him for what is happening. ‘Oh dear, don’t you feel submissive? Are you feeling confused over what you endure? Poor thing, are you feeling like an abnormal fool? But you know you will continue submitting to me 100% don’t you, we both know you will never choose the option of no domination. Yes. You are a pathetic submissive fir making the choice you do. But you make it and so I own yiu and I can do whatever the fuck I want with you. CAN’T I! ‘

          1. Thank you once again for correcting me and giving me the benefit of your wisdom, Mistress Scarlet.

            You are right, of course, that subs are not really a ‘lower form of life’. I clearly got carried away in my attempt to describe how submissive I sometimes feel, and made a silly rhetorical flourish.

            Your description of the symbiosis between the dominant and submissive is absolutely right I think, and again, you bring out the essential nature of the relationship with such clarity that it is a pleasure to read your reply.

            And you are absolutely right about the gratitude a slave should feel. The distinction you make is crucial. Of course he should feel gratitude to the dominant/superior woman for using him and paying any attention to him whatsoever, rather than gratitude for suffering per se.

            I am in awe of your ability – and that of the other dominant women you refer to – to limit the slave’s ‘down time’ to a minimum. Your wisdom and experience is amazing. Thank you for the examples of phrases you use to taunt the slave and ensure he returns to obedience and devotion as quickly as possible.

            bb truly is lucky to be owned by such an intelligent and brilliant Mistress.


            slave 307

  7. Hello Ms Scarlett
    I am a long time lurker, devotee and admirer of your blog and books. So far I have not dared share your writings with my Mistress wife. In some ways my deeply submissive nature craves the more extreme regimes and punishments that you inflict on bb and I would love my Mistress to follow your lead. On the other hand the thought terrifies me to my core!
    I have been locked 24×7 in a fairly small chastity cage now for over a year. My Mistress never, ever allows my penis to come into contact with any part of her skin.
    However, I am given the opportunity to be unlocked once a month for 5 minutes to masturbate. Of course, as every sub knows, there is no such thing as free orgasm. If I accept her kind offer to be allowed to masturbate it is made as painful and unpleasant as possible. We have a similar glove to yours but homemade (a basic leather glove with drawing pins/ thumbtacks pushed through and sometimes I have to wear it while trying to get off within the time limit. Other times I have to don a condom containing a teaspoon of Tabasco. A third option are severe nipple clamps attached by a thin chain to my the ring on my middle finger. The chain is just too short to reach my cock so every strokes is absolute torture.
    This arrangement causes me real mental anguish. I desperately want to orgasm but I know the pain will be awful. It has now got to the point where I usually decline the offer simply because the fear of the pain exceeds my sexual urges but it is a real mind-fuck!
    Thank you so much for sharing your lifestyle with us – one day I might pluck up the courage to introduce my Mistress to your blog!

    1. Your mistress sounds wonderfully dominant and cruel.
      Are you in the UK?
      Could you provide more information?
      Do you have to do chores?
      How does your Mistress gain her sexual satisfaction and is she fully content sexually?
      Does she tease you in some way to make your sexual frustration worse?
      How does she react to you declining the offer of being allowed to cum?
      Do you beg to be allowed to cum without the pain?

    2. Thank you so much Mistress for reading my post and taking the time and trouble to reply.
      Yes, we are in the UK – down on the south coast.
      To give a little more background, I have always been submissive (my first, and probably life-defining, experience was when I was around 9 years of age). However, I never had the guts to admit it until much later in life. I tried to fulfill my submissive needs subtly by things such as doing all the housework and back in the days when we had sex making sure that her pleasure took priority.
      Eventually after our children left home I confessed my submissive nature – fully expecting rejection. Instead, my wife embraced the idea fully. Our sex life in recent years had dwindled to virtually nothing and I believe that she suddenly saw lots of new doors opening!
      My wife has always been the dominant (with a small “d”) partner and the step up to Dominant came very naturally. The first requirement was that i should never again be allowed unsupervised masturbation so we purchased a chastity cage. Our (or rather, her, sex live immediately went into overdrive! I am now required to provide her with orgasms whenever she wishes. She is not a huge fan of oral so these are usually manual or with a sex toy. We do not share a bedroom so I don’t know if she pleasures herself privately and if is none of my business.
      Yes, I do all of the chores – I shop, cook, clean and do all the laundry etc. Punishment is by weekly caning which she delivers with vigour! The usual number of strokes is around 20 but this can be increased if I have performed poorly or been disrespectful.
      She decided that I should be offered the opportunity for monthly release but it should come at a price. Hence the devious methods that she devised. She thinks it hilarious when I choose not to accept the opportunity knowing how desperately I need to orgasm and the mental anguish caused by declining.
      I could go on Mistress and describe other aspects of our relationship but I am sure I have taken up too much of your time already.
      Thank you again for your wonderful writings.

      1. Thank you for the information.
        I would LOVE to hear more. I love all the details of such a relationship. There is always ideas for me and others to pick up.

        1. Thank you for your interest Mistress.
          As I intimated, our marriage has always been an FLR one though until quite recently without the femdom trappings. She made most of the decisions, controlled the finances and just expected me to do all the chores. Being submissive by nature I accepted all this without a second thought.
          Once I plucked up the courage to admit what I was, things quickly escalated. The first step was the masturbation ban and the chastity cage (we have gone with a steel one). The cage really necessitated removal of pubic hair. She liked this feminine look and the removal of all hair from my torso and legs rapidly followed. As a constant reminder of my status, I was also required to wear female underwear.
          My wife has always been a very possessive person so she thought it would be fun for me to get a tattoo showing her ownership. Just above my cage, on my lower groin, I now have a tattoo of a heart shaped padlock and the words “Locked by Txxxxx”. I love the tattoo though having it done by a female artist was a little embarrassing!
          My chores at home rapidly increased until now I do pretty much everything. My wife rarely has to lift a finger.
          Sexually, she has become insatiable! I am required to bring her orgasm very frequently and in addition I have learnt to give her full body massages several times a week, which she adores.
          I have been locked in the cage 24×7 now for around 14 months. I have only orgasmed probably 5 or 6 times in that period. As mentioned, I am only afforded one opportunity a month to masturbate and that is always associated with pain. By far the worst is the Tabasco-filled condom. The burning is awful and on every downstroke some of the sauce inevitably gets forced into the urethra causing excruciating agony.
          Canings take place every Thursday evening. As she has become more proficient they have significantly increased in how painful they are. I am blessed (or cursed!) with the type of skin that does not mark easily. This really annoys my wife and she is determined to get to the point where the marks last days.
          For my birthday she bought me a maid’s outfit which I sometimes have to wear for additional humiliation during punishment but this side of our relationship has yet to fully develop.
          To outsiders, we probably appear pretty normal (though my adult daughter did comment on my shaved legs recently!). Most evenings are fairly vanilla and we will spend our time watching TV or playing cards (once I have cooked and served dinner and cleared away of course!).
          So far our relationship is nowhere near as develop as yours and bb but I think the journey has started and things will become more intense. In many ways I crave the lifestyle that bb has under your control but in others it terrifies me!

  8. Reading your responses to me and slave 307 makes me question whether I am a true submissive since I only feel helpless and in awe of my wife when I am teased and aroused but denied any relief. Unfortunately, my foolish hope seems to spring eternal. When I recognize that I am to be denied again, I crumble.
    I am chaste but not caged (I have asked, but she does not want me to wear a cage) so sometimes, later when I am by myself, my self control fails me, I relieve myself and I feel selfish and guilty. Of course, I then become even less likely to initiate service to my wife’s needs which are mainly non-sexual services like massaging, foot rubbing and hair brushing. She has told me to “GIVE UP”, STOP thinking about myself and become a REAL SLAVE! I feel like I need her to have some leverage over me that would modify my behavior permanently. I would be grateful if you could make any recommendations for how I might finally rid myself of self-gratifying misbehavior, abandon all expectations of tit for tat rewards and simply serve my wife as a true slave. Thank you for reading this rambling note and being subjected to my pathetic whining.

    1. I believe you are a true submissive because the one time you are subject to pitiless power and cruelty is your paradise. You simply are not subject to that in any other context.
      Has your wife read my book for beginners?
      I hesitate with this this idea, but I suggest you consider an ultimatum along the following lines, put to your wife this way:
      ‘I have tried very hard for a long time to be submissive to you despite you not exerting any real power over me. I can’t seem to make it work despite me trying to for so long. Could you please experiment with keeping me in a chastity device? No commitment for doing it long term, just do an experiment.’

      If she agrees, you will have to be the BEST husband IMMEDIATELY and for the duration of the experiment, so she loves the benefits of you being caged. If she does not agree, you can say you wish to have a break from being submissive to her in any way because you are confused and lost.
      Btw what benefits does she get from you being submissive to her?

      How does this sound?

  9. Ms Scarlet, are you still using the book of raffle tickets to keep track of how many orgasms bb has left in his life? Does he know how many he’s got before they stop forever?

  10. Ms. Scarlet,
    Your analysis of my situation is spot on. I long to have my wife exert real power over me. Without duress, I feel like a “volunteer”. I have tried periods of “submission strikes” in the past and she mostly lets them go on until I get horny and turned on by something, try some masculine maneuver which she shuts down leaving me aroused and denied, obedient and powerless. It’s as if I attempt these male stunts to be “rewarded” with denial which is her being dominant. I then provide the benefits she derives from me being submissive: hair brushing, full body massage (which she makes go on sometimes until I am exhausted), foot massage and worship. Nothing sexual for her. Of course, my sexual arousal soars and continues well after I have caressed her to sleep as the scents of the massage creams waft around me.
    Your suggested plan sounds like a possibility. I think a cage would shift my focus from self-serving masculine behavior to caring for her because any relief for me would be totally up to her. The only problem is that I am already the BEST husband(I just said that so I could picture you laughing).
    She has not read your book. She might take a look if I present it in the right way. I think the key is to figure out what will give her real power over me to make me perform to her wishes and abandon mine. Whether that power comes from caging or something else we can think of is the challenge. Thank you for your advice.

    1. It’s a gamble that might backfire but I think you need to confess you will NEVER be able to avoid secretly bringing yourself off if she tries to continue her regimen without a chastity cage.
      I also suggest, before showing her my beginners guide, you could show her the home page of my alternative website, and the page headed, ‘so your husband is a submissive’.

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