1000th post

So this is my one thousandth post. I cannot really believe it. I have been running this blog now since November 2010, almost 12 years. I have struck up some great relationships, I have learned a great deal, and had to deal with some nasty pieces of work and some who are insane! Here is hoping for another 12 years of followers and commenters who are overwhelmingly interesting, informative, candid, patient, empathetic and open to new ideas.

What is the most surprising thing I have learned? The perplexing paradox of wonderful dominant women who are more then happy to share full details of all the malevolent, depraved perversities they impose on their subs, but are so shy and coy about how arousing it is to do so; and most importantly how numerous and powerful their orgasms are as a result of their power and exploitation of it. One of the reasons I began writing my journals was because of the ‘community’s’ silence on this issue. Femdom literature rarely mentioning this arousal/orgasm phenomena while in all other forms of erotica, one can’t get through a page without a woman rendered unconscious yet again by the strength and frequency of her recent orgasms!

The other reason I began writing my journals was because, with the ending of publication of the hardcopy Madame magazine, and the shift in emphasis away from femdom in the petticoated.com website letters page, there was almost nothing available describing real-life long-term femdom relationships, with all the glorious details involved. I am not sure I would ever have become dominant without these two sources of REAL-LIFE detail. Much more recently, to this end, with help from a number of fantastic contributors, (you know who you are), I published an alternative blog and manual with the sole purpose of persuading vanilla women to have a go at a life of dominating their submissive male.

Without coverage of the orgasms issue and without real-life accounts, femdom had little to offer a curious vanilla woman, and I wanted to do my tiny bit to bring the numbers of dominant women up in some tiny way if I could; naive old thing that I am! I can promise you that reading about professional dominatrices at work, female prison guards running a male prison, a future world run by man-hating female supremacists, a dominant race of female aliens taking over planet earth, dominant female nurses running a hospital for male patients, and all the other fantasies and irrelevancies to a real-life wife or girlfriend absolutely do not do it for a curious vanilla woman, believe me!

So a BIG thank you to all of you who have been and remain; interesting, informative, candid, patient, empathetic and open to new ideas. Hopefully I will be publishing my two thousandth post in the future.

85 thoughts on “1000th post

  1. Amazing. Thank you Ms Scarlet for all the time and effort you put into your writing and everything you give to this community. We are forever indebted to you for all your blog post, books and BDSMLR posts as with you we wouldn’t be in the most wonderful, cruel and orgasm rich (for me anyway) relationship. Here’s to another 1000 posts. Hopefully I’ll have another update from our progress soon

    1. With Elise Sutton and petticoat discipline disappearing your blog is becoming one of the main sources of real life accounts. Congratulations on what you have achieved!

  2. Thank you *so much* for continuing to take your valuable time to share your thoughts and experiences! Please do continue on for 1,000 more!

  3. Yours is such an important voice, particularly for the women out there who find it hard to give themselves permission to live this way. There are so many men who would jump at the chance to yield to such feminine power. Men who ache to be under such an irresistible spell. You’re a light in a dark place, and I’m so pleased to see you succeed as you have.

  4. Congratulations! Your blog has been an inspiration for both me and my husband. May you continue to write many more entries and journals.

  5. Thank you so much for your 1,000 wonderful posts Ms. Scarlet. I have followed you from nearly the start and can’t even begin to tell you what your blog has done for me. My personal responsibilities have prevented me from living my life’s purpose, but I have been able to live vicariously through your wonderfully vivid depictions of the Female Led Relationship you’ve created and of bb’s place in that.

    You have always had the amazing ability to be able to give me intense feelings of both pity and envy for bb’s predicament, of wanting desperately to be in his silly Mary Jane’s and being incredibly thankful that I’m not. I have so desperately longed to be in Female Led Relationship that was not a game, that was in effect 24X7, and you’ve shown me what that really looks like. Now I not only long for it, but fear it.

    Thank you!

    1. I hear you KD. Mistress Scarlet’s excellent blog provides a glimpse into a real life sadistic FLR. Feelings of envy and pity arise in equal measure. For me, being in BB’s position seems like getting drunk. Great fun at the time, but the morning after..

      1. The analogy is very good, but the opposite timing is the case? His feelings are very painful and humiliating during the periods of his endurances, but between the endurances, he feels utterly submissively content. A contentment he had craved all his life before meeting me and introducing me to femdom.

        1. Your dominant contentment and BB’s submissive contentment are, as you have so often said, the perfect symbiosis that makes your dynamic so fulfilling and successful. It is a wonderful thing.
          But happily, people aren’t all wired / programmed the same way. Femdom, like life itself, is such a rich and wonderful tapestry with infinite variations on it’s glorious theme.
          I was previously attempting to say that, for me, those moments of endurance and pain would be the prize I craved (the drinking in my previous analogy) and afterwards, during the inbetween, I would be wondering “what the hell.. ” (or contemplating my hangover if you like)
          Opposite, yes. Not bad or wrong. Just different.

          1. Ahhhh, yes I get it and can see it now.
            It is the case I notice there are times of my more extreme cruelty where bb goes into sub-space and I am clear in those moments, he has such an undiluted feeling of being helplessly in the power of a pitiless, cruel woman, that he gets his deep contentment during his ‘endurance’.

  6. Dear Ms Scarlet,

    Congratulations on your 1000th post! We are so lucky to have found your blog to guide us on our journey. No pretence or play but the REAL thing.

    And I love your picture of boot with the symbols in your post. In fact, that may be the tattoo design I was looking for :).

    Thank you

  7. Thank You so much Mistress Scarlet for sharing Your thoughts and experiences. Your blog, books, etc are unmatched in their quality and insightful comments. i always look forward to every one of Your posts and You never disappoint.

  8. Many congratulations. I can’t think of anything I’ve read anywhere else (your Journals excepted!) which has engendered such a sense of awe and excitement. I am only sorry you’ve sometimes had to encounter the lunatic fringe in being open about your very advanced lifestyle. Hopefully you haven’t being affected one jot by the negative. Once again many congratulations.

  9. Congratulations Mistress! I must say I found your blog first when I was looking for real dominant wives. I have yet to find any other that’s as authentic as your blog. You are defiantly number one in this field. 11 days locked and still playing it low key she did give me two slaps to the face in the shower for missing some spots while cleaning it.

  10. Congratulations for your persistence in continuing with the blog, always so pleasant to read in every way.

    If I may, I would like to humbly suggest if you could put a list of posts made on the side of the page, with the years and months and their respective publications, there are so many publications by you that I would love to reread but I can never find them.

        1. I am really sorry, I still do not understand.
          Where do ‘the publications’ fit in and what are they?
          I cannot list 1000 posts at the side?

          ………..If I may, I would like to humbly suggest if you could put a list of posts made on the side of the page, with the years and months and their respective publications, there are so many publications by you that I would love to reread but I can never find them………..

          Do you mean you want a separate link to each of my publications? The journals and manuals and guides?

            1. Ahhhh. A sidebar menu of posts by month/year. I will look into it but the last time I tried, It made my blog impractical for smart phones use. It seems only to work well for lap tops and desktops. I will see.

        2. Dear Sissy priscilla,
          I believe you wish a severe punishment, myself when I misbehave, bore or upset my Mistress I kneel her feet begging punishment, sometimes when we aren’t together I send a mail, sms or whatsup.
          I’m a lucky submissive because soon or later I receive punishment or several, usually.
          I hope and sure you’ll be punished.

          1. If Goddess Scarlet wants to punish me I will accept any punishment, I currently don’t have a owner so I would have problems, besides that I’m a deep admirer of the Goddess for a long time.

              1. I believe punishment can’t be pleasant, I hate pepper, I’m disgusted so I’m going to use this to punish myself, I’m going to chew it for 30 minutes and rub it on my dick, maybe writing something helps me improve as a submissive and a sissy, the Goddess may please tell me a sentence for me to write? What does the Goddess Scarlet think of this punishment?

                  1. Dear Goddess, I did my punishment, I put two peppers in my mouth and passed one on my dick, at first it made me want to vomit, this desire remained until the end, after I bit the pepper it started to burn my mouth, but what I found most painful was the pain in my dick, it started as a slight pain that after about 3 minutes reached its limit, I felt like I was raw, it was horrible, several times it crossed my mind to give up.

                    what do you think of this line “I have to be a better sissy and write in a way that my superiors understand, my superiors’ time is sacred.” If you don’t like it, please let me know.

                    How many lines do you want me to write Scarlet Goddess? (If you want I can send you photos so you can check if they were well done.)

                    1. If you want to be an email slave of mine there is an application process. I cannot spend my precious time on this titillation solely for your gratification alone.

  11. Dear Ms Scarlet, I have never commented before but your blog is the best one on the internet by far for dealing with all these issues! Thank you! Bobbie

  12. Congratulations Ma’am. Such an amazing achievement. Like most of your followers, I stand in absolute Awe of your commitment to promote the case for Female empowerment and male subjugation. I have personally followed you for years and years, watched you grow in stature and you have excelled in so many ways. You always stand firm in your beliefs and never back away from misinterpretation. As an educationalist, you deserve to be a lecturer at Oxford or Cambridge as your knowledge far surpasses any person I’ve ever known in my fifty odd years living and hiding as a closet submissive.
    So I offer my thanks to you. You have been a guiding light in our dark world. May I also wish you every success in what ever venture you pursue in the future. Your journals have been amazing. I loved every one of them and my favourites are the first and your last. The first because there was nothing to even come close to your lifestyle, and the last journal because the journey has kept changing and becoming even more fascinating as you turn the screws, literally and actually, in bitch boys tormented and tortured way of life. A life he wished for but may one day actually regret. I have to thank you for your amazing manuals too. Full of wonderful ideas and suggestions You are a magnificent role model for young women throughout society today. In the here and now. I applaud you, Ma’am. Please do keep up the amazing work you do, Respectfully yours,
    maid matilda ( uk )

      1. Just an absolute pleasure to give you the praise you so deserve. You are totally Awesome Ma’am. So Thank You again! I think I’m probably right in saying;
        “ You are one in a million.”

  13. Congratulations on your achievement! One thousand posts is an astonishing milestone (so to speak) especially as your posts have so much content and are not merely a few words of comment. Of course, you have been on a journey and journeys often lead to unexpected, unanticipated places. The replies published here show that there are many who have found you to be an experienced, knowledgable, engaging guide and are delighted to follow where you have lead.

  14. Mistress Scarlet, I have been reading your blog for the past 4 or 5 years now. What a fantastic account of your life and your thoughts on dominant female relationships.

    I check for post updates daily and im always excited when a new one is posted. As much now as when I first found your blog on the previous platform (maybe tumbler?).

    One thing I want to give you massive credit for is your way of writing. It is so concise and to the point without any unnecessary waffle but yet captures all the detail of complicated situations and emotions. I have tried to emulate your style when I write emails and such at work. Your an educator is many forms!

    Congratulations and here’s to another 1000 posts.

    1. Thank you so much for the very, very kind words. (I had both training for writing legal reports and training for issuing Public Relations statements and info (very different approaches) and I use the best bits from both.

  15. Congratulations Ms Scarlet!

    This is the website i have been returning to for the longest time. Always interesting, usually very exciting, but probably most importantly to you, very, very helpful in furthering our own kinky lifestyle. We have got to fantastic places I could never have hoped to get to without your sage words, combined with the motivation of seeing what really is possible, outside of fantasy.

    Such a well-written and informative site, and the engagement you give to your comment leavers (even me sometimes) is often just as enlightening as the main posts, and hugely appreciated. Without it, sometimes you and bitch boi would not seem real.

    Well done for rising above the haters too – they are such a tiny minority, but SO loud. I have seen too many good blogs give up in the face of them. Thank you for rising above so serenely.

    I have so much love for this website. Here’s to the 2000th!
    Sweep

  16. I have read and recommended your blog for several years. I think your understanding of a sub and his mindset is spot on! I check every day to see if you’ve posted an entry. Thank you!!

  17. wow and congratulations Ms Scarlet – you are doing a wonderful job and I always look forward to a new post from you and your new journals for that matter. as a sub seeking a Mistress, I have learned a lot, both thrilling and scary.
    seeing it was your 1,000th post, something came to my mind about the One Thousand and One Nights collection of Middle Eastern folk tales and of BB being denied for a 1001 nights!

  18. Dear Ms Scarlet
    Many, many congratulations on your 1000th blog post. I and my sissy subby slutty spouse are avid followers and have been for many years. I have most of your books and find them a wonderful inspiring resource of Femdom ideas. Many thanks for sharing your real life experiences . Here’s to another 1000 blog posts . Warmly, Alecto x

  19. Thank you Ms Scarlet. I would like to add my thanks to the many who have acknowledged you here. I love your writing style. So authentic and exciting. I have followed you for years, read all your journals and will continue to do so for as long as you write. You are unique. Thank you for the work you do and congratulations on reaching your 1000th post!

  20. From the moment I discovered your blog it’s been my favourite place to visit. I check daily for new posts and read every one and all the comments.

    Thank you for this wonderful blog, for standing up for what you believe in, for sharing so much knowledge with your followers, and for being a beacon of understanding for us poor subs.

  21. A hearty congratulations Ms Scarlet for reaching an epic 1000 posts. Many blogs come and go but you’ve kept sharing your experiences and knowledge and we appreciate it. Thanks too for putting the ‘real’ into real life female domination.

  22. Dear Mistress Scarlet – many, many congratulations on your 1000 posts milestone. i thoroughly enjoy your posts and always find them thoughtful and inspirational. Although Owner and i have a slightly different FLR to the one you have with BB your blog and responses to comments (and kudos to you for so diligently responding to readers) always make for a fascinating read.

    p
    x

  23. Mistress Scarlet, congratulations on your 1000th post. It is a truly remarkable achievement and an amazing milestone.

    I want to thank you so, so much for creating this incredible blog and community and for everything you do to keep it going. All your work in writing, reading, editing and nurturing the debate and discussions on your blog. Your enormous patience with some less attentive readers (sorry!) and time wasters.

    Thank you for placing a firm emphasis on women’s pleasure. It is really the only thing that matters and it is wonderful and refreshing to read accounts of real-life female domination that concentrate on the female orgasm and what dominant women enjoy, instead of male fantasies.

    Thank you for doing so much to help introduce other women to the joy of domination and for encouraging them to explore and use the power they have over submissive men. In my humble opinion, there is nothing more beautiful than a woman finding joy in using her power over us and exploiting us for her benefit and entertainment.

    I hope you will continue to write and maintain your wonderful blog for a very long time to come.

    In deep gratitude,

    slave 307

  24. Miss Scarlet, I would be remiss if I did not add my congratualtions and thanks to all the kudos you are receiving with this post. Your personal and general advice has obviously been so valuable to so many; which brings up a question I ask you to consider. In the 12 years since you began your blog, the LGBTQ+ community has gained recognition, acceptance, praise and has “come out of the closet” to being almost commonplace in media and life in general. Yet, despite the apparent widespread existence of FLR, chastity regimes and recognition that male submissiveness is an inborn trait that appears early in life much like homosexuality, not a “choice” so to speak, the submissive lifestyle has not, in my opinion, “come out” to the same extent. Most femdom seen in media resembles cliche`d examples of what you refer to as the mainstream femdom industry. Do you agree that femdom has not advanced in the public eye as much as the rest of LGBTQ+ and do you (or your readers) have any thoughts on what seems to be an intractable embarrasment associated with being a submissive male and what it might take to some day celebrate what might be a lifestyle oxymoron of “submissive pride”? I sometimes fantasize about a world where your blog with your encyclopedic knowledge of the subject was more publically distributed and where men in depictions of submission do not mostly hide their faces. Thank you again.

    1. Your comparison of the FLR community with LGBTQ+ raises 1000 issues for me and you are right to raise it. As far as I can see, the main problems are:
      1. The only TV channels that run with femdom stuff want titillation. They want dominatrices with bull whips and leather or latex. They want dungeons and cages. They want scantily clad women. They don’t want a middle aged married couple who have none of these things.
      2. Many Dommes and subs have no idea about the psychology of what’s happening in their relationship. That is why, after testing and honing, I coined the overwhelmingly accepted definition of a submissive male: A male who can only be content at the deepest level if he FEELS helplessly in the power of a pitiless, cruel dominant woman. If TV companies pick representatives of us who have no idea about the psychology of what’s happening in their relationship, as I have seen several times. The viewer receives zero education of any value.
      3. There is a medical, scientific explanation for the stupendously ridiculous needs of submissives, (stupendously ridiculous needs as viewed by vanilla people). I once put that on my blog and it was rejected and ridiculed by people who took offence because they have zero knowledge of science and human biology. This explanation is amazingly helpful to our community but as it is rejected, we are very stuck indeed.

      I don’t actually make references to the, ‘mainstream femdom industry’. But you make a good point here. What should we call the femdom image destroyer phenomenon? I will call it the, ‘profit focussed femdom’. In the main being, dominatrices (with whom I have never had a problem and still consider they fulfill a vital role) and femdom porn makers. (femdom photos and videos).

      I produced my alternative website with consultee help, to set out the what makes a submissive tick. It has haled many couples. Given the above problems, especially 3, I cannot think of anything I can do.

      Thank you so much for the kind words and the thought provoking topic.

  25. Thank you for your thoughtful response to my queer-y. Personally, I like the description of submissives’ needs as “stupendously rediculous” as those needs hugely defy common sense in the vanilla world. (And, speaking of descriptions, I got my “mainstream femdom industry” wording from the third paragraph of your My BDSMLR Site web page.)

    The Broadway play “Venus in Fur” made it’s debut in 2011. The play was done very well locally here a few years ago and I have to admit, i was a bit shy about telling anyone that my wife and I went to see it. Who knows, maybe some time in the future, armies of dominant women will march their submissive partners to a theatre to see a well done “Fifty Shades of Scarlet.”

    1. I did laugh at your reply! ‘queer-y’, very clever.
      And “mainstream femdom industry” wording from the third paragraph of my My BDSMLR Site web page. It just shows how things have moved on since I wrote that as with the advent of Findoms, I now find it not quite hitting the mark. Well done you though for the reference. Perhaps I’m getting dementia. LOL.
      And, I would love to write the screen play for Fifty Shades of Scarlet movie! Brilliant. LOL.

  26. I appreciate this chance that the Goddess is giving me to be her email slave, for an inferior being like me to be able to be a superior woman’s email slave is an honor, I want to be.

      1. sorry for the inconvenience I don’t live in uk, there’s no way I can be your slave right. Have a good week ahead.

                1. You have missed your window. I have changed my mind. You do not live in the UK, so no shopping slave trips for me to enjoy. I have reflected that, to have you as my email slave would be effort and time for me and no compensation for that effort or precious time that I can think of.

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