Tag Archives: forced

The ‘S’ word and the ‘C’ word

I mentioned in my post on 21 August 2019 the term or label ‘SADIST’, along the lines of the following two paragraphs.

I have expressed often, that sadism is a natural trait in humans inherited through evolution, as a means of clarifying relative statuses in a pack of mammals. It’s form in humans is taking pleasure in inflicting  physical and/or mental pain. One must have power over the subject of ones sadism. (Be of higher status in the pack.)

It took me a number of years to accept having the word applied to me although there was NEVER any doubt I was a sadist. (My definition is someone who finds pleasure in inflicting physical or mental pain on another.) Now I treat it as a badge I am proud of. It seems it takes considerable independence and mental strength to reject the behavioural shackles of society to the extent of acknowledging one is a sadist.

One comment on that blog post re-confirmed that other Dommes have a problem with the word, sadist. I am really wondering why I too used to have this problem years ago, and so many other Dommes still do. I am fairly sure that if a Domme says to a sub male she meets, that she is a sadist, the sub male is instantly in awe of the Domme and instantly placed on a pedestal. So why the resistance of Dommes to the ‘S’ word; many of whom ARE happy to be labelled, cruel?

I should amplify that causing pain can by of the physical type; or mental pain through serious humiliation, degradation or tedium; or the pain of teasing and sexual release denial.

The definition of CRUEL from the MacMillan Dictionary:

– someone who is cruel, who enjoys causing pain to other people or animals, or enjoys making them unhappy or upset

The definition of SADIST:

– someone who gets pleasure from hurting or being cruel to someone else

I would be very interested to have comments from Dommes who are, and who are not, happy to be labelled, sadist, and why they feel as they do.

I would also be interested to have comments from subs confirming whether they find that hearing a woman is a sadist has an effect on them.


For info on my own BDSM manual, click on an image below.


Name to shame

Well those of you who have read my Journal No. 14 will know, among other things, bitch-boy’s training is continuing as a deep throating, cock sucker, money maker, whore. I am training him so that should I ever need him to earn money for me through this activity he is ready to hit the ground running! And I am also training him because it is very pleasurable for me to train him and very shaming and quite physically distressing for him! (Although his progress is good past the gagging point.)

I want to give the thirteen inch double ended dildo, you will have read of in my Journal No. 14, a suitable name to make it easy to refer to it. ‘Go and get the thirteen inch double ended dildo….’ is a bit of a mouthful; excuse the pun.

A photo of the is the item to which I refer. An obscene object I know!

13 - Copy

I have several names I have thought of but I wondered if sissy male followers and my wonderful Domme blog followers could either or, suggest even more shaming names, or advise me which of my names works best.

Deep Reamer, Anaconda, Dicktator, Tonsil Trasher, Throat Blocker, Throat Thruster, Sissy Skewer and Pansy Plugger.

Thank you in anticipation.



I recently had a comment from a follower that included a question. I have answered the question but wondered if other Dommes may have ideas to add to my answers? First the follower’s question, (edited).

…….it appears sissy chrissy has been in her role as a sissy maid for quite sometime 24/7. I wonder then about sissy chrissy’s embarrassment at having to show his impotence to a group of women.  Of course, for a male this would be beyond humiliating but with anything, after enough time, situations can become very familiar and lose their impact. If sissy chrissy were to present herself everyday for 10 years, it is unlikely her embarrassment would be the same on day 1 as it is after 10 years.

In your experience, how do you maintain the impact of such embarrassements? Or do you think that submissives (consciously or unconsciously) allow themselves to continue feeling the embarrassment to further fuel their submission…….

My answer follows:

Regarding your question, ‘How to maintain the impact if such embarrassments?’

First I would say submissives, (consciously or unconsciously), <strong>ABSOLUTELY DO NOT </strong>allow themselves to continue feeling the embarrassment to further fuel their submission. I do not believe this is even possible. I don’t think someone can make themselves feel embarrassment if they do not feel it.

This topic is very important to me because it might actually be my favourite power rush when I have bitch-boy dressed in the absolute worst possible shaming outfit and knowing he will shortly be performing ludicrous acts in his outfit, and we stand outside the door of the room <strong>IN WHICH A NEW DOMME WOMAN HE HAS NEVER MET BEFORE</strong>, awaits. He actually physically trembles and whispers his desperate pleading and I feel SO POWERFUL smiling at and rejecting his heartfelt pleading. It is the end of the world for him. Its delicious.

So one way to maintain impact is a NEW woman to be present.

Another way is three or more women. The dynamic becomes overwhelming for the sub and they metaphorically shrink at the triple onslaught.

Another way is to make sure the women are dressed in clothes they would wear in the street. (High heels are good if they make the women taller then the male, otherwise not necessary.) The point of this is that the submissive is shamed in some extraordinary way, but at the same time, the women are not dressing in any special way linked to eroticism. He is the ludicrous creature, they are relaxed and it is just another day for them. It is not a special occasion for them. It is just a highly amusing distraction. For maximum impact they must not act up in a theatrical way, just be themselves.

Another way is big age difference. A submissive in mid forties presented with some women, one of which is in her very early twenties or a woman in say, her very late fifties seems to have a BIG IMPACT!

Other ways involve ‘small’ changes. Changes seem to bring back the full misery. Perhaps a new venue. If it is normally indoors, have it all outside on the patio. Perhaps got to one of the other women’s houses.

Another change is a change of outfit for the submissive. If it is normally sissy maid. Go for parody of a 3 year old little girl, or a parody of a ten year old 1950’s school girl, or a sissy boy outfit of huge lemon yellow satin shorts and a matching satin top with huge white Peter Pan collars.

Another change, for the particular example in question, on one occasion, paint the floppy little organ bright green with indelible stain. Or rub into the organ some nasty embrocation cream just before locking it back in its spiked cage and then laugh when the tears and physical distress begins.

Link to my journal 12.






For more info on my own BDSM manual, click on an image below.


Ejaculation without orgasm (Part 2)

Well there have been so many comments on my last post.

As with most things, people are different and so there has been different feedback. I would just like to introduce some clarity of word use so we all use the same words for the same things. A male orgasm is an ejaculation WITH a mental feeling of euphoria. Penis muscle spasming without euphoria is ejaculation not orgasm. Release of semen without euphoria but with a sense of mental and emotional release is still not an orgasm.

So the consensus (majority experience) is that ejaculation by prostate stimulation; or by vibration or electrical stimulation while locked in a chastity device, produces ejaculation without orgasm, even if it can provide a sense of mental and emotional release for some males. I had forgotten about producing ejaculation using electrical stimulation from a TENS type unit. My thanks to all those who have commented so far, it is fascinating and very helpful.

Ejaculation without orgasm

A comment has caused me to seek advice from you dear followers.

I think for a male there is an ejaculation without an orgasm as well as an ejaculation with one. An orgasm includes a huge feeling of euphoria. I can give bitch-boy a spoiled ejaculation by stopping all physical contact with his penis the very first moment ejaculation begins. Another way is when he is caused to ejaculate without euphoria by prostate stimulation. In these two cases, there is an ejaculation of semen but no euphoria. HE HATES THIS!

An orgasm (feeling or euphoria) appears to require appropriate continued stimulation of the penis once the ejaculation has begun, until it ceases.

I have never given him an ejaculation, when he is locked in his CB6000 by continued use of a vibrator/massager on the surface of the CB6000. (Partly because he is usually locked in his polycarbonate tube and I only use the CB6000 for special occasions.) I have seen on the web, ejaculations caused this way. I wonder if there is any euphoria, I would have doubted it. If you have experienced an ejaculation while in a CB6000 or similar chastity device, was there euphoria?

Chastity for Females

OK, I have always wondered this. The full-on chastity devices for females, do they prevent access to stimulate the clitoris, or do they only stop vaginal penetration?

I would be very grateful to know the answer. I have to say I am very doubtful they do.

Even a finger cannot be squeezed in, could a cliteral orgasm be produced by using a powerful massager/vibrator on the outside of the belt, over the area of the clitoris?




Cleaning tear stains and make-up

Well as a result of the foundation Governess Lexi has been thickly applying to bitch-boy’s face and the lipstick either she or I thickly apply to his lips, (and perhaps the result of the odd tear running down from his made-up eyes), the white satin Peter Pan collars to his newest shaming dress have some make-up on. Does anyone know how to remove make-up from white satin?



Public Blindfolded Helplessness

I have a pair of sunglasses which have thick brown paper glued to the insides of both lenses. The wearer of the sunglasses is blind when wearing them, but to anyone looking at the wearer it appears they are simply wearing sunglasses. The potential is great! I have Play-toy wear them whenever I am driving her in my car. She gets so anxious when I tell her to lift her dress hem and play with herself. Not knowing who might be watching. Very amusing. And she never knows where I am taking her on any drive. If I pull over for some reason, she immediately gets very scared, even if I have left the engine running.

Well, I have seen these contact lenses on Tumblr. How fantastic would it be to have your slave blinded for as long as you want, in public places, by contact lenses. Much harder to remove than a pair of sunglasses!


Viagra helping to abuse him

I am becoming an expert in the use of Viagra – or more precisely, the cheaper substitute I have begun using – Sildenafil. It takes 30 minutes to kick-in on an empty stomach and around 55 minutes on a full one. It lasts about four and a half hours from the time it kicks in. For those Dommes who have not used them on their subs, I will take this opportunity to explain the effects I have found drugs like Sildenafil actually have.

I will first destroy a myth. The fact is that if there is no arousal stimulus, there is no erection!

If you have read any of my later journals, you will have come across my description of the phenomenon I refer to as beast-of-the-farmyard behaviour. This is a reference to how male farmyard animals will become aroused when faced with an arousal stimulus despite whatever else is involved in their circumstance. The beast-of-the-farmyard phenomenon has always amazed and disgusted me in equal measure. In a typical demonstration of it, bitch-boy may have been sexually denied for 10 days in the run-up to it, he may have my slender, cool fingers expertly tickling and teasing his sensitive, shaved balls and clitty, I may be dressed very provocatively, and so he becomes erect although he knows the result will be some pretty extreme penis torture or other. Perhaps nettles in a pouch or Deep Heat embrocation cream or multiple smacks with the ruler, (or more likely a combination of these things!)

So why do I bother with Sildenafil at all? Three reasons. Reason One – there is a limit to the beast-of-the-farmyard phenomenon. If his little clitty has already been made dreadfully sore, he can fail to become erect despite the other stimulating factors. In addition, if his humiliation is at a profound level, he can fail to become erect despite the other stimulating factors. What drugs like Sildenafil and (I assume) Viagra do is to greatly increase the response to arousing stimuli. So the balance of arousal versus disincentive, is tipped very much further into arousal. So with the use of Sildenafil, the beast-of-the-farmyard phenomenon overcomes more disincentives to arousal than it otherwise would.

Reason Two – Because the drug’s action, once there is arousal, is to open FULLY the blood vessels, the erection becomes absolutely granite rock hard! 100% rock hard, which overlaps with reason Three.

Reason Three – a wonderful feeling of extreme control for me that even bitch-boy’s little clitty becomes hard on my whim and he can do nothing about it – even in the absolute worst of circumstances for him, when, without the drug, he may manage to remain flaccid.

A note of caution. I did make bitch-boy go through a prescription process (although his was online) with a doctor from a reputable company. I think it is a bad idea to just obtain these drugs without having gone through the proper medical checks!

I most recently used Sildenafil when Mistress X visited. One thing we did was use a pouch full of stinging nettle leaves. It was amusing that his little clitty was so very rock hard at the moment the pouch was pulled over the clitty and the drawstring tied home at the base of the clitty.