Tag Archives: mistress wife

Declarations and Domme’s Orgasms

I received the comment below and felt my lengthy answer really desrved to be a blog post rather than be hidden away as a comment response. So here is the comment I received followed by my answer.

Dear Mistress Scarlet,

If I may, I would like to make one comment and pose one question.

Firstly, I would like to comment on the life-changing power, perhaps under-appreciated by some, of the making of a formal declaration. It is one thing to see that a change (such as ever-lengthening delay between release) has ‘crept into’ your life; and to be told, in bold and explicit terms, that such the change is deliberate, recognised to be unfair, and utterly permanent. I have seen that a number of times in my relationship, most recently when Mistress announced that I was a Born-Again Virgin.

With an undeclared change, the sub can always cling onto the idea that it is temporary, inadvertent, or a mistake. That hope is dashed with a formal declaration. I also wonder what effect that has on the dominant woman. Which brings me onto my question…

In many posts and in your books, you state that increasing levels of dominance and cruelty ‘ratcheted up’ your sexual (and other forms of) satisfaction with your relationship with BB. But, on hearing about the frequency and intensity of your enjoyment, one rationalisation is that this must be because you (Mistress Scarlet) are an unusual and rare woman who just has the capacity for multiple frequent orgasms, and so other women cannot replicate similar levels of enjoyment.

So could I ask you to please clarify (and yes, I am aware that this question has overtones of the line from Life of Brian ‘If it’s not a personal question: are you a virgin?’) if, before you discovered BDSM, were you someone who had an unusual capacity for fulfillment from vanilla sex? Or (as I suspect) were you previously a person with a fairly ordinary level of response, and attribute your current degrees of arousal and satisfaction entirely to the levels of sadism and dominance which you practice? To put it another way, do you have an unusual responsiveness to the ‘drug’ or is it a medication from which anyone from benefit?

My Answer

An indication of how much I agree with you about the value and significance of declaring changes which are intended to be permanent, is that two chapters of my new publication, Addendum No.1, deal with this topic. Not just deal with it but provide suggestions to maximise the impact. The first section is about Recording Dates of the last time ever of an activity, so that anniversaries can be ‘celebrated’. The second is about A Cruel Countdown Procedure that can be used in the lead up to the last time ever of an activity. Neither can be employed without a declaration.

Putting aside the huge effect on bitch-boy of having made a declaration, the effect on me of having made a declaration is very powerful indeed. Having made my six week minimum gap for orgasms declaration; I feel totally pitiless, all powerful, decadent and truly cruel. A heady cocktail of feelings that do lead to arousal. Which brings me to orgasms for Dommes. (I sense you may have read my latest publication?)   In Addendum No.1, there is a large chapter on enhancing the number and intensity of the Domme’s orgasms.  

Although you ask very personal questions, I feel I must answer them to further my crusade to have more women enjoy the number and intensity of orgasms I enjoy. My story does cover the key issues. Firstly, I do not have a rare and unusual capacity for numerous, powerful orgasms. I do know what prevented me from so being, until my eyes were opened to a few facts.

Until I met bitch-boy I had never masturbated and had had hardly any orgasms; although I had boyfriends from the age of 15 and then a husband. (So no, I certainly am not a virgin!) BUT, the first night I spent with bitch-boy, I had more orgasms that one night than I had previously had, added together, in the whole of my life before that night. No wonder I fell for him!

This brings me to the first AND CRITICAL FACT that applies to me and to every single woman I have ‘converted’ over this fact. Relying solely on penetrative orgasms is a huge mistake. Clitoral orgasms is where intensity and large numbers of orgasms are found for most women. bitch-boy being submissive, (unbeknown to me at the time), had his head between my thighs that first night and kept it there for a LONG, LONG time. (I was much younger than him with an amazing body, I can understand he was driven by his submissiveness to secretly worship me that night the best he knew how.) He also told me that night that I should not attempt to have him get as much pleasure as me, because men are built for one orgasm and women are built for many. I felt it was unfair on him but he insisted and I went with it. Look where that has ended up! (Be careful what you wish for.)

A few years later when my dominance and his submission had begun in earnest, I read an article that set out how dominant women should masturbate because of the number and intensity of orgasms that are possible – without a man’s assistance! The article also suggested it is optimal to use a vibrator wand. (It suggested a Hitachi 5000- it was years ago.)

I experimented and the article changed my life! Then once I began to become a SERIOUS Domme; unsympathetic and unashamed in wielding power, gratuitously, cruelly and pitilessly, I understood the saying, ‘power is an aphrodisiac’. It certainly is! I am not alone by any means in my orgasm numbers. Every single Domme with whom I have engaged in relevant conversations, who uses a wand and who masturbates, enjoys the number and intensity of orgasms I do. I should stress this masturbation is most often in front of one’s submissive; it is not exclusively performed alone, although I do both.

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Making Comments on posts: Comments do not appear on my blog until I have moderated them. Comments that insult anyone will not be published, nor will aggressive comments. A wide range of views is truly welcome, we all have things to learn, however comments will not be published that take a contrary or critical view to any aspect of a post, but fail to explain why this contrary view is held, or fail to address the reasoning set out in the post to which the comment relates. (Such unexplained contrary comments are simply boring.)

Nurse Nasty’s new brush

17 April 2021

Following a tip from a fellow Domme, I saw this advertised in a magazine and immediately thought it may be a particularly effortlessly effective tool for Nurse Nasty to use during cleaning phases of naughty, little, stiff birth-defects.

It arrived; and holding it in my right hand and using a light scrubbing motion on the underside of my left forearm, certainly gives me the feeling I was right when I saw it. The bristles are quite sharp and It will indeed be a particularly effortlessly VERY effective tool for Nurse Nasty to use.

The underside of my left forearm is where I try most new toys to be used on birth-defects. It is sensitive skin, but perhaps not quite so sensitive as the skin of a birth defect; but I get a good gauge. It’s a while since a fully restrained and gagged bitch-boy, (with legs secured wide apart in the gynecological stirrups), and he has endured a thorough clean and treatment session from Nurse Nasty. And after the thorough cleaning, as the nettles are now at their most stinging this time of year, I think, to start, a herbal, organic nettle ‘treatment’ will be very thoroughly applied after the cleaning; followed by a skin invigorating ruler smacking, then a ‘soothing’ Linnex moisturise. Of course, pleading for the treatments to stop will not be of value because, as we all know; NURSE KNOWS BEST!

During this first treatment session, Nurse Nasty will no doubt have to sit and rest several times, with her Lelo wand in hand, such will be the patient’s whimpering and pleading and sobbing, she will HAVE TO satisfy her own resultant symptoms! While the patient is suffering the Linnex and feeling so very, very sorry for himself, he will be told he is to get a rest of half an hour, to an hour, and then treatment session two will take place; exactly the same as treatment session one. (I do think double-downs are so good for submissives that need to be left in no doubt they are: truly helplessly in the power of a pitiless, cruel dominant! It helps them sleep so soundly at night.) And bitch-boy is SOOOOO lucky to have all this free private health care!

[The double-down concept is included in my published, Addendum No.1. Simply put, a double -down is when a sub is just finishing enduring a particularly tough time and is feeling VERY sorry for himself, the Domme immediately announces there is forthwith to be another very horrible thing for him to endure. No sympathy, no pity – The Double-Down. Regular blog readers may have noticed Christine M frequently uses double-downs and sometimes even triple-downs!]

Making Comments on this post: Comments do not appear on my blog until I have moderated them. Comments that insult anyone will not be published, nor will aggressive comments. A wide range of views is truly welcome, we all have things to learn, however comments will not be published that take a contrary or critical view to any aspect of the post, but fail to explain why this contrary view is held, or fail to address the reasoning set out in the post to which the comment relates. (Such unexplained comments are simply boring.)

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A link to all my publications HERE, including:

Enforced hormone treatment for sissies

One of my very favourite on-line stores, Birch Place Shop, sent me an email alert to a new range of products and clothing they are selling. Included in the selection was L.D.B. Estrogen Pills.

The results of taking the pills include:

  • Skin firming and tightening the skin – smooth and soft, Enhanced breasts, More slender limbs, Wider hips, Decreased testosterone.

I know some males who long to look like females would love to take these pills, BUT, how frightening for a reluctant sissy, like bitch-boy, who hates being a sissy and dearly would like to be a man all the time!

I thought, fellow Domme sisters, that it would be very amusing to buy a bottle of the pills.  When they arrive and unbeknown to him, you could replace the pills with harmless vitamin C pills. Force your reluctant sissy take a pill each day. Then the mind-fucking can begin as you tell him you might have replaced them or you might not have. You can caress his ‘breasts’ and hips saying you think they are getting bigger. Any time he does not get a hard-on when normally expected , you can comment that its probably because his testosterone levels are fading away.

Obviously if he has not been allowed to read this blog post, you could replace them and not tell him you might have, so he 100% believes he is being made to take Estrogen.

Link to my published journals detailing my day to day life.