Tag Archives: sensory deprivation

My BDSMLR site

My new BDSMLR site that replaced my Tumblr site already has 1600 followers. I imagine so far BDSMLR has far fewer users than Tumblr.

My Tumblr site had over 18,000 flowers before Tumblr was sold and ‘explicit’ images were banned. I always took from the number of followers an indication that there were/are many people who share my tastes in female dominance. Particularly things not in the Femdom mainstream industry, like; #males distressed by petticoating humiliation, #males undergoing hours of tedium, #males being humiliated and ignored, #wives, girlfriends and or mothers-in-law dressed in everyday clothes humiliating a male who is naked, or is a sissy maid or school-girl, #the use and abuse of males in everyday homes, #’lesbian’ wives with their girlfriends cuckolding their chastised husbands .

So where possible, I do not post images in dungeons or where women are in corsets, leather or PVC. Some examples:





















When I imply ‘I post’, that is not actually the case. bitch-boy is given a number by me, of posts to make each week, sometimes high, sometimes low. And these posts must all be images I LIKE VERY MUCH. If I do not like one, or I am inadequately titillated by one, he is, of course, punished. And given his state of sexual denial and his inescapable chastity cage, I am sure the poor thing finds this task quite a trial!

There are no posts of lesbian domination. As much as I adore a pic of a helplessly bound and very vulnerable female submissive, I feel such imagery is not suitable for male submissives to be pointed toward.


Use equipment?

I do wonder about whether dominant women who do not use much BDSM equipment are missing out.

I know there are considerable barriers to equipment use for some people, such as purchase cost, discrete storage space, setting up time, etc, but I am interested in what other Dommes enjoy.

Considering a simple spanking or caning. I know some women use no bondage at all on the their sub for this. I absolutely get the power rush that probably comes from knowing they have so much power that the male obediently stays still and in position, and stays relatively quiet without a gag, both despite the ‘discomfort’ they may be enduirng.

But for me, having bitch-boy gagged and secured face down over the dining table, ankles secured together, thighs secured together just above the knees and wrists secured together behind his back, gives me a HUGE sense of power and decadence. It enhances the experience for me.

Then we come to bondage. Some of my bondage activities require a lot of paraphernalia. When I play with his boy’s bits while I watch TV. He has his ankles bound, thighs bound, balls bound, wears a collar, there is a chain running down his spine from his collar to the binding of his balls, his wrists are in cuffs behind his back which are secured to the chain, he is blindfolded, and wears industrial ear protectors! This bondage will last between 60 and 90 minutes and I will usually have 4 orgasms during this time, (see previous post!). For me the bondage effort is well worth it!

Just the feeling I get from my power, seeing his utter helplessness, sensory deprivation and his vulnerability is pretty much a turn on enough for me needing my first orgasm!

I don’t know if other Dommes do as I do with regards to ‘delegating’ equipment responsibilities? I will tell bitch-boy I want to play with his boy’s bits and he is then instructed to, ‘get everything ready!‘ While he does so, I read or watch TV.

It is the same with his sensory deprivation on the BDSM bed, or him enduring Dolly-Potty-Time or any other activity I enjoy that requires equipment. He has to get the equipment together and put it out helpfully and then put it all away afterwards. So even with the considerable number of items for playing with his boy’s bits, I am only ‘troubled’ with dealing with the equipment for a couple of minutes to secure him and then a couple to release him at the end.


Spring nettles!

I know I have been banging on about stinging nettles through the winter. But I can now report new ‘spring’ growth has arrived. And my how it stings.

Some heavy frosts at the end of January did kill off the nettles, but already, yesterday, Mistress Nicola came over and in preparation, and more in hope than expectation, I looked and found new stinging nettle sprouts.  These were only four inches tall and the small dark leaves formed a tight dome at the top of the stem the size of a coaster. HOWEVER, as you will know as a follower of my blog, young pre-flowering stinging nettles have the worst stings that last the longest. Would these tiny shoots deliver these attributes?

Mistress Nicola arrived and after an hour or so of ‘fun’ activities we secured an already miserable bitch-boy to the BDSM bed with the gynaecological stirrups. I got him hard, the nettle blanket was put in place and then Mistress Nicola, in a pair of my elbow length leather gloves, picked up a stem of the nettles and went to work. WOW! The commotion and whimpering and pleading!!!!! These little stems of leaves absolutely did sting very aggressively.

As is the habit and joy of Mistress Nicola, she was enjoying herself and thoughts of pity were nowhere to be found as she continued to lash down with the nettles on the defenceless object again and again and again . She turned his birth-defect this way and that seeking out virgin territory. bitch-boy was continuously pleading and sobbing into his gag. When she had finally finished he was in a rather distressed state as obviously the stinging continues long after the initial onslaught. Such was her cruelty that we found we were rather aroused and after kissing and caressing in front of him, we left him to his sobbing and made our way to my bedroom.

I hope some of you will be pleased to learn that enough has changed or been added to my life time regime and my special days with Nicola, that I am writing a journal just like my original ones, wholly about what happens under my roof and under Nicola’s roof. New things like the Stomping Stage which I will post about on Sunday.


Xmas day nettles, AND MORE!

So we reached Xmas day and I WAS able to use nettles on bitch-boy!

They were good and stingy, but the stings did not seem to last too long. On reflection I should have followed up the nettle whipping with a treatment of Deep Heat or Linnex. But I am sure bitch-boy felt his stiff little clitty had suffered enough as I had started with a session of the 12 inch ruler using VERY HARD smacks indeed; before moving onto the nettles.

Christmas is a time of giving, so I started the day off by giving him a VERY SERIOUS deterrent punishment session. Ignoring completely his sobbing and repeated pleading through his gag, until I felt fully satisfied I was done with each of the five implements I used. The dressage whip left some lovely thin purple lines which are still there this morning.

Then I gave him an hour of teasing on the sofa while I watched TV. I have several orgasms during this as he is soooo frustrated and I get to see his red and striped butt when I glance away from the TV.

Then the clitty torments already mentioned, followed by an hour and a half of sensory deprivation bondage. He endured a disgusting  semen / water ice chunk in his funnel gag. Finally, while he was still helplessly bound, I generously gave him a PROPER orgasm with my skilled hands. Although he had to beg for a long time to get it and suffer another session with the ruler. His milkings since Nov 13 had all been spoiled and under the sole of my shoe. Oh my how he sobbed when he came yesterday. He has suffered quite a long period of denial; on the whim of Mistress Nicola during her visit to us on Nov 13 – ‘…..only spoiled orgasms until Christmas bitch-boy.

I had eight massive orgasms during this long DS session. It turns me on so much being a heartless, total bitch!

What a delightful Xmas day!


For info on my very popular BDSM manual, click on an image below.


White Noise Alternative – Initial Test

Further to my previous post yesterday, I tested the white noise alternative on bitch-boy. That alternative being an 18 minute audio recording of a harsh deterrent punishment session dished out by Mistress Nicola and I. bitch-boy had it playing on a repeating loop in his ear phones during an almost two hour sensory deprivation bondage session, (interrupted just once by me to apply a second whipping of his clitty with nettles, forty minutes in).

I interrogated bitch-boy as to the difference between the white noise he is used to and the audio recording with the threat of SERIOUS punishment if I felt he failed to be 100% honest with me. He reported that with the white noise there is extreme tedium but his mind is left to wander which sometimes helps to fend off the tedium.

With the audio recording, firstly there is deep humiliation for him having to listen to his own whimpering, sobbing and pleading during the recorded thrashing. Secondly, an unequivocal emphasising of the serious sadism and pitilessness of Mistress Nicola and especially me, on how we truly see him as no more than a toy we can subjugate into obedience and can hurt, simply because we want to. Thirdly, he could not take his attention from the recording even when he tried to. So his mind could not wander beyond his helpless submission to me and all he has to endure. Time dragged very slowly for him!

I would say a great success! Whether these advantages will fade away as the hours of listening cumulatively get into the hundreds, only time will tell. I will keep you all informed.



Shaming White Noise Alternative

As Mistress Nicola was attending my house for a day of use and abuse of bitch-boy, I actioned a thought that had been brewing in my mind. An experiment for an alternative to white noise, to be played through bitch-boy’s ear phones when he is regularly in his  hours of sensory deprivation bondage.

The alternative being, a recording of a serious punishment session of him. A deterrent punishment which is how Mistress Nicola, and I like to kick-off one of her visits. The punishment was duly recorded and can be now played on a repeating loop. I’ll see how it goes.

One thing that surprised me was how long a deterrent punishment session lasts for poor bitch-boy. This one lasted just over 18 minutes. I was surprised at this, having never paid attention to the time taken. That’s 18 minutes of Mistress Nicola and I taking turns with various implements; thrashing his butt and the backs of his thighs. Marks are left that last around three to seven days. On this occasion, my plastic tube cane, my rattan cane, a large leather paddle, a small but vicious rubber paddle with a rough surface, an agitation whip and a dressage whip. Mistress Nicola purposely allowed some wraparound when using the dressage whip and left eight distinct purple lines at the side of his butt / side of the top of his thigh, each about three inches long. These marks I expect will last a couple of weeks.

I was concerned that bitch-boy would minimise his whimpering and begging and also perhaps Mistress Nicola and I would become somewhat theatrical. I am pleased to say the recording device was truly forgotten about by all three of us almost immediately the deterrent punishment began.

Third flush of nettles!

What an amazing summer we have had in the UK. Still having warm sunny days in late October. One fantastic result has been the stinging nettles. You will recall how the young pre-flowering stems of leaves have the most powerful stings and the stings last the longest. After the first spring growth this year, the nettles eventually flowered, but by then the earliest patches had been cut down and within a few weeks a second flush emerged. New,  young pre-flowering stems of very nasty leaves.

AND NOW, never before seen by me in the same year, A THIRD flush of  new,  young pre-flowering stems of very nasty leaves! I have become very cruel indeed with the wonder of a third flush! They will be gone soon until March or April, so I am making the most of them. The last two days has found bitch-boy, among other miseries and humiliations, bound helplessly on the BDSM bed for the afternoon. After several types of dickie-discipline, I finish with the nettles and I go on and on and on; until bitch-boy is sobbing and writhing. I then tell him he will be in sensory deprivation bondage for an hour or two but I will be up to refresh his nettle stings to his clitty every half hour. I have to orgasm as soon as his blindfold and white noise ear phones go on as being SO VERY, VERY cruel seriously arouses me.

I keep to my promise and visit him very half hour to tickle and whip that nasty little birth defect and he sobs and sobs.

While I sit relaxed downstairs, watching TV, or reading, or on the phone, I hear his continued sobbing on the baby monitor long after I have applied the most recent application of nettles. I have to orgasm again and again! I am sooooo BAD! But as I often remind him, he introduced me to Femdon all those years ago and he only has himself to blame for what he must now endure.


Early praise for Journal 13: The Institute

I am so grateful to those who provide positive compliments on my journals; like those below for the new Journal No. 13.  It encourages me to write more and supports that my style and life experiences are of interest and hit the mark to many in our lifestyle.

### Just finished this wonderful journal and forwarded to my Mistress………

### I immediately purchased Journal 13 as soon as I read it was available. I have just completed only a few dozen pages, and I believe it may be one of your best. Thank you for creating the best writings for the BDSM community.

### Oh wow! Just WoW!! Purchased & read avidly in one day. This boy would so like to endure the ‘Slug’ like experience… Simply magnificent femdom – thank you for sharing your bank holiday weekend.

### Loved your latest journal, No.13! I read it over two days and savored each horrible/ thrilling punishment and torture of each slave. I found myself going into a form of subspace just reading it! Your best book !

Given the journal is of 70.000 words I am amazed many people read it in one go!

As I mentioned in a previous post it, is available on Amazon Kindle, and from Lulu.com in ePub format and paperback. Since my last post it has become available in Nook format on Barnes and Noble.

I will let you know when available on Kobo, iTunes, etc.



Volume 13: The Institute, Click on any link below:

Lulu.com –

Paperback version,       ePub version,

Amazon Kindle –

USA,    UK, 

DE,    FR,    ES,    IT,    NL,    JP,    BR,    CA,    MX,    AU,    IN, 

Nook – Barnes and Noble




Intensity and Frequency

Many Dommes are unable to dominate their men every day. Stuff gets in the way. It is still good for Dommes in that situation however, to keep their sub in constant 24/7/365 awe of them. This does mean that when there is a domination weekend, or day, or evening, it is useful for the Domme to remember two determinants that generate constant awe of her in the sub. (And very importantly, are also likely to increase the arousal of the Domme!) Intensity and Frequency. If the domination session will be a special occasion because, for instance, a guest will be joining you, then these issues are not so important. But if it is to be just the two of you, well…………

Intensity is the easiest determinant to employ. If employed correctly, the sub will always have some genuine fear and trepidation when it is announced that it is Domination Time! That is the measure. If he does not have some genuine fear and trepidation, then the last domination time had insufficient intensity. Planning ahead, or while enjoying the domination time, the Domme can think about whether what she is doing is likely to have the sub fearful of the next Domination Time. Is the spanking or cock and ball torture generating genuine, heartfelt pleading? And if so, will it be done more than once in the session? Will the heartfelt begging be ignored for a good period time. Is the duration of sensory deprivation bondage long enough to cause some misery and fear for the next time. Is the tedium punishment long enough? How many hours of line writing, or colouring-in with dolly or locked in the dog cage in the garage? And as I mentioned earlier, increasing the intensity is almost guaranteed to increase arousal and power-rush for the Domme.

Frequency is the second determinant. The frequency of the domination sessions.  The ideal frequency is when, (although the submissive NEEDS to be dominated to be content and they know that), they nevertheless beg to be let off a domination session. Because it is the third consecutive day or the fourth consecutive night, etc.


For info on my own BDSM manual, click on an image below.