First, a HUGE thank you for the amazing response to my previous post. I am so grateful to have such a helpful gang looking out for what is best for me! THANK YOU!
Unfortunately, a good number of commenters on my last post suggested gender neutral names for bitch-boy which was not the task. The task was a way to replace the words, ‘he’ and ‘him’ and ‘his’ with genderless terms that would not be used for a human being. Also a number of commenters suggested using “speech marks” which unfortunately cannot work as I will often use the terms in question, “within passages of speech“, which are already in italics and bounded by speech marks.
The vote was broadly equal between options 1 and 3. There were a number of objections to 3 over it causing confusion to the reader. (No apostrophe when there WAS possession.) There were objections to option 1 over confusion with the acronym for information technology, which I struggled to have sympathy for given, firstly the context of what I write, and secondly, how the subconscious of the reader will quickly adapt to the use I MAKE of the word IT. And also objections over what I deal with in my next paragraph.
As many of you know, I analyse everything that is based on convention. I reject a huge amount of convention in the domination-submission world that has so often been founded on misunderstanding and never been corrected. For instance: The term BDSM. The phrase, Safe, Sane, and Consensual. That the male in the book Venus in Furs was a masochist! So many commenters had a problem with capitalisation of the word, ‘IT’, because capitalisation has often been used in femdom communications for references to the Domme, while lower case used for references to the submissive. (A very clunky and significant grammar error no one seems to have a problem with!)
Raising this issue with me, caused me to think long and hard about the importance of my slave-husband. I resolved that while it is true that he has no importance of status, he is of great SIGNIFICANCE to me, is that importance? A significance worthy of capitalisation though! It has me thinking all long-term submissive spouses warrant capitalisation, but not for reasons they like! They are a very significant focus of their Domme when they so often would rather not be.
There were only two commenters who wanted bitch-boy to retain a gender. I am perhaps incorrectly thinking that means everyone else would prefer I choose option 1, 2 or 3 rather then 4, even if the option I choose out of 1, 2 or 3 is not their preferred option. No one wrote that were I to choose an option from 1, 2 or 3they did not like, they would stop reading my journals!
So, although my mind is not made up at all over what I will do, I probably will eradicate his gender and I am minded to go for, ; ‘IT’ and IT’s, and if so, I will include the following within the introduction of my next journal:
For possible inclusion in the journal introduction
He and his are replaced with IT and IT’s in this journal because I have chosen to delete the gender of my slave-husband. As IT has at most, two erections and orgasms per year, and soon will never have any for the rest of IT’s life, for all intents and purposes IT is not male, and certainly he can never reach the high status of female. No operational sexual organ equals no gender.
The capitalisation does not represent importance of status. The capitalisation has three purposes in all.
## Chiefly, it is to make it easier for the reader to understand the passages.
## Secondly, it is the case that the capitalisation represents significance. IT is very, very significant in my life. IT is the foundation of my totally satisfying and extraordinary sex life. IT is also my personal slave, providing manicures, pedicures, hair washing, hair drying, leg and cunt and arm-pit shaving, feet moisturising, etc. IT is also my chore slave, doing all chores inside and outside the home so I have no chores to do. I am sure IT wishes IT was not significant to me in this regard.
## Thirdly, IT is the target of my gratuitous meanness and my sadism. I am sure IT wishes IT was not significant to me in this regard.
IT, certainly does not feel the capitalisation represents importance of status! Clearly the capitalisation cannot represent importance of status given: IT is constantly teased but has no sex life, IT does all the chores and often the most lowly chores repeated several times. It is physically tortured for my amusement, and IT is a thing that suffers the worst degradations and humiliations. No, the capitalisation clearly cannot represent importance of status and I am sure IT very often wishes IT was not significant to me in the ways it is.
Mistress Scarlet's Blog 
A brilliant choice if i may say so and i love your rationale for why IT should be capitalised as IT is clearly a very important piece of property that you own.
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IT must love being your IT. I can’t imagine a women removing my sexual organs but knowing it would be your choice would be the ultimate turn on.
IT…you’re so lucky.
That’s a clear and honest decision 👍🏻
Thank you
One other possible option i see would be to write the pronoun as iT, thereby maintaining the traditional lower-case spelling of a sub, yet giving it a uniqueness to differentiate from the commonly used word “it”.
Hmmmmmm
very good Miss and fully understood best wishes
I’m late to reply but I’ll raise my hand in support of gendered descriptors. If the male is inferior then shouldn’t the he/him term be used as part of the belittlement? Whilst “IT” is dehumanising, I feel that to undermine the masculine by use of he/him, but always with an obvious degree of contempt, is potentially far more devastating to the notoriously fragile male ego. “IT’ removes him from his gender yes, but it and might also distance him from his deep seated male insecurities. Nanny, the woman that controls my life, keeps me in a pastel blue nursery and most of my baby wear is blue also – letters on the nursery wall spell out Baby Boy and Boys belong in Nappies – all because she wishes to reinforce my male identity in order to ridicule it. In her words “the male is a failure”, and a ludicrous baby boy outfit is far more appropriate. She says if I were dressed as a sissy she might be tempted to coddle me, and I might even enjoy it. She much prefers my shame and misery and she finds it far easier to treat me with utter contempt with my masculine identity constantly confirmed and utterly ruined. One of her favourite teases is to reduce me to tears and then, raising my trembling chin with her finger so that I have to look into her calculating eyes, she’ll sneer “why are all boys such crybabies?” I literally feel my testicles contract with fear under such derisive gendered abuse. I have no answer for her, and she doesn’t expect one, she just knows I feel total shame at my misfortune to be born male. And with the ugly defect of maleness trembling limp and impotent in the face of such derision my identity only adds to my overwhelming embarrassment. I Should point out that Nanny does not have any time for the trendy notion that ‘some women have a penis, she finds the idea ridiculous and quite insulting. That misfortune is something that only men need to cry about.
Many males are superior to many females.
He has no deep-seated male insecurity.
His male ego is not fragile.
He is not a failure, his vanilla person is hugely successful.
Your proposal is built on foundations that do not exist.
BUT!!!!! Your nanny is fantastic. I would love to subject IT to her! (And she could call him anything she wished!)
As i was by one MISTRESS defined myself by the term it , its and itself i can say myself that i felt completely happy with ‘it’, I dont know whether you feel that. this next comment is appropriate or out of context Mistress Charlotte but i feel obliged to say that. there appears to be a trend in this contect leading. to the male /hussy-itself closely becoming akin to a truly genderless it by means of a castration so would you please tell me if this is one of your goals and purposes please? For myself there is something extremely compelling to a male submissive to want this to happen despite the lack of any sexual fulfilment that it would mean for the slave /hussy it being to be concerned about . I have made drawings which i would like to send to you for publication on. your bdsmlr website as to a visualisation of the ritualistic effects on the male pysche. ( If you so desire that is? )
It is not my intention because I understand the sexual drive is reduced to almost nothing when a male is castrated. I would miss out on the constant gnawing misery of sexual frustration he suffers and I love! I also like he is so near, yet so far, as he is intact to perform sex and have orgasms, BUT he is not allowed.
Ah now i fully understand Mistress Scarlet. You are perfectly right if course and yet im sure i heard somewhere that eunuchs could still perform the sex act without having any testicles ?? In fact i also recall that when a man has a Vasectomy the sperm ducts to the testes are tied up so that no sperm is conveyed to them and thus no ejaculation is is made of sperm but nonetheless you still obtain something of an orgasm. When i was young and
then going through puberty i was able to achieve an orgasm without ejaculating sperm so now i wonder if having the testes intact is irrelevant ? I heard also that eunuchs would still be capable of sexual intercourse and erections would be unhindered.
None of that relates to me wanting to MAXIMISE his sex drive.
Please forgive me Mistress Scarlet as i was somewhat thinking out ‘aloud’ here. It does seem irrelevant come to think of it but i would have thought it far easier to maximise his sex drive without doing the above anyway and in multiple ways too. I have taken to wearing penis rubber rings around my cock and balls and i must say that my sex drive has increased tremendously since i have been doing kegel exercises and eating more Zinc via Pumpkin seeds and blueberries etc. Even as i speak now i am feeling as Super Randy as i was when i was in my teens. Deprivation itself is a great spur to me and yet my wife gives me no sex at all and i’ve never asked her why. My drive is at a red hot peak now and im thinking of sex all the time and am on dating websites galore but most are either useless or scams or very expensive.I am so horny that if almost any pretty women would want me i would jump at he chance and offer to be her slave to boot!
i can now fully appreciate your exquisite pleasure from the. power exerted through your ability to torture him far better now Mistress Scarlet. The combination of the physical and mental tortures must be immense but the pleasure of pleasing his Mistress is in near equal measure perhaps or else it would not entirely work i guess?
Sorry MISTRESS SCARLET BUT I SHOULD HAVE SAID MISTRESS SCARLET NOT MISTRESS CHARLOTTE AS I AM NOT ACQUAINTED WITH ANY MISTRESS OF THAT NAME At This time. It was merely a mental aberration thats all and io beg your forgiveness for my stupidity .
As someone who brought up the capitalization (or not) concept, your point of focus awareness is a valuable insight. So often I see lowercase objectification used in online context and of those who are not involved in long term relationships. That difference I did not notice until you highlight your difference here. Interesting stuff, thanks for sharing that insight.
Thank you for your comment.
As promised, I applaud your decision! This linguistic objectification drive’s the slave’s status home as a THING of abuse. As a reader, it has a surprisingly striking effect. LOVE IT! (Still confused why It was not offered as an Opt 5 tho…?)
I am very intrigued as to whether you intend on mirroring your writing choice verbally w/your IT. Since 1st hearing of Dommes that do, I have pondered the effect that might have on me in my own subjugating journey…curious.
Unfortunately I have found one cannot apply ‘it’ when talking to it. Unless you can come up with a sentence I could say that does?
Reblogged this on subbyp and commented:
Another magnificent Blog post by Mistress Scarlet!
Ah it all makes sense now. As always You’ve reached the correct decision.
In total awe of You Mistress Scarlet!
Thank you
In your discussion about option 3, you write: “There were a number of objections to 3 over it causing confusion to the reader. (No apostrophe when there WAS possession.” My understanding is that “its” does imply possession while “it’s” is normally a contraction of “it is” so the raised objection is not viable. Of course, your discussion of why you like capitalization is wonderful and I will keep reading your blog and journals regardless of your choice!
‘Its’ does not imply possession for the majority of people as the comments show, simply because basic English education does not include the topic of apostrophes for non-human entities. Given that for human entities an apostrophe before an s at the end of the word does imply possession. Having written that, you only have to be on Facebook or Twitter to see around 20% of the population have no idea how to use apostrophes at all.
May i simply say that to today i received my frenum lock which is the same as you bought yourself for about £9 on Ali express. i would send you a photo if i could. Your influence is growing in me at least.
You have a frenum pieing or PA peircing that takes a 5mm gauge ring?
No indeed not ,Mistress Scarlet i do not a have. a piercing as yet and am holding fire on it in case there are some side effects that i may not be aware of as yet. I have the 3mm version for the present.
side effects???
Well, to answer your question Mistress Scarlet, to begin with i worry about the risks of infection as i tend to heal rather slowly. I recently cut a finger and even after 10 days or so its still a bit sore.
If you are looking for a word to act as pronoun for Bitchboy which is non-gendered, and want to avoid potential confusion, have you considered using Bitchboy’s initials as a pronoun?
‘The steel table gleamed as I strapped bb to it. I held up the cane and bb looked at it with fear… etc’
I am not looking for a word to act as pronoun for Bitchboy. I was looking for words to replace , he, his and him.
Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I meant to suggest using ‘bb’ as a replacement for he, him or his. But if you don’t like the suggestion, that’s fine.
I’ve been following your blog for years but the incorrect use of the apostrophe drives me nuts (or should that now be “nut’s” ?). After this comment I will no longer be following your blog or purchasing any further Volumes. I’ll be a minority of one so it won’t matte at all. I wish you continues success in the future.
So aggressive and unnecessarily mean. I am hurt by your comment and stance.
I totally agree with You Mistress Scarlet! Whatever decision You have arrived at is the correct one!
Ms Scarlet It works for everything. Foe refering to myself i use it,my male number or oink.
I’m with one of the above comments. I like keeping gendered language (he/him) to reinforce the female authority aspect. Power play between male and female is the most exciting to me, especially TPE. So basically a man trapped in an extreme female-ruled household, suffering under a pitiless sadistic woman. A genderless object being dominated is less interesting (but of course it’s not about what I like!)
Forget to say I love your blog and your bdsmlr, please never stop posting
Having followed your highly informative blog for some time, I would like to thank you for making the effort to create it. No pun intended. I had contemplated suggesting the use of the name Gimp as I feel it objectivizes and humiliates in equal measure. But IT, it is. Your proposed introduction is very concise. Thank you again for a wonderful Blog.
I am afraid I have changed my mind, as today’s blog post explains. Thank you for your patience in this matter.